My last day here-This is my story. AMA


    Chapter #41

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    ILoveV

    TS, sibei drama leh you

    want quit then quit la. still got confession and addiction.

    lousy bonk then lousy bonk, still hve to twist until it’s your fucking fault for not going away

    i really applaud you for your writing prowess.

    You should be grateful that you’re not in my boat. I pray that you never get to experience what sex addiction to FL is like. Tried to quit for 1 week plus but relapsed. I really wanted to quit but I just fucking cant. I dont know why. Its like my whole brain and body just turned against me and I have no control. Thats how hard it is to quit this fucking bullshit.

    Maybe to some of you guys reading, you may get a good laugh out of it and find it funny. I dont really care- at least you guys get some joy out of my misery so from a utilitarian perspective, its not that bad.

    But I hope you change your mindset about addiction. Its not that easy to cure/fix. Its like going to a halfway house for drug addicts and telling them “Eh KNN just quit la why so difficult”. See how they react bro.

    Post #116
    5 comments
    Chapter #42

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    Penguin23

    You are not addicted, you just have high sex drive. High sex drive is a blessing and a curse, it means you have high levels of energy and you can achieve more, but that also means you need to fuck more. Which is the reason why you relapsed, and you will continue to relapse.

    If you choose to see this as a curse, then you will forever be torturing yourself and blaming yourself. I wonder why you want to do that. I see high sex drive as a gift, or rather the flip side of the coin of having high levels of energy and motivation.

    There is no such thing as a horny man being able to “channel his energies to more productive pursuits”. If a man needs to fuck, he will yearn for a fuck. Self-service helps, but only up to a certain point. In your early years, all you want is a warm, receptive pussy. When you get older, your bullets deplete and you want a quality fuck and the emotional connection that comes with it.

    Unless you chemically castrate yourself.

    What you need is control of your emotions, so that not every sex bonk becomes an emotional trap. Not something that any 24-year old is expected to know how to do, most guys can’t do it well into their 40s.

    I am in a relationship with an ex KTV girl who was born a man, and yes she was born in a third world country. So in your books, I’m going to hell. The way I see it, I am already experiencing heaven on earth and I thank God that at 48 years old, my cock still works fine.

    This is where you are wrong bro. Go google semen retention. Sexual energy is one of the greatest energies in the universe. Strong enough to create life. By learning to abstain and channeling the sexual energy into something more productive, a man can achieve unimaginable heights.

    Go try it out for youself- masturbate 3 times vs abstaining for a week. The difference is like heaven and earth. Did you know Mike Tyson used to abstain from sex before every big fight?

    According to chinese TCM, theres a saying “one drop of semen is worth ten drops of blood”.

    As for your ladyboy, it has nothing to do with religion. You just have questionable tastes, thats all. Ask a random atheist on the street and they will also be disgusted, no offence.

    Post #122
    3 comments
    Chapter #43

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    syncrossed

    It’s amusing because you dont see the twisted logic of trying to create a therapeutic environment for yourself in the same place you are condemning and running away from.

    Trying to be accountable here? To ppl who fuck whores for fun and gratification? And you say you are highly educated? HAHAHA

    Sure, some of us sympathise with you. But this is really the last place you should be spending time in if you really want to “change”.

    You’ll be surprised at the number of people who PM-me and told me of their similar experiences. I do know for a fact that there are lurkers here reading my post who choose not to comment. In a way, there is survivorship bias at play here. People who vehemently disagree with what I wrote are more likely to comment. Hence, dont be misguided by the comments here thinking it reflects the true reality. Accountability MATTERS because there are people here who are in the same boat and want to get out, just like me.

    But you are right about the second point though. Posting here is indeed a double-edged sword. I’m in the lion’s den, exposed to all the temptations. Perhaps that played a part in my relapse.

    Post #126
    0 comments
    Chapter #44

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    ILoveV

    TS is just a cute troll

    )))

    Impossible to troll. Even the best troll here dont have the imaginatiom to concoct what I wrote. This is actual reality, but I dont know how to prove it to you over an anonymous forum.

    Post #127
    0 comments
    Chapter #45

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    syncrossed

    So when is your appointment with a Psych specialist?

    Not even sure if I can afford it- Im still a student. This ML/FL bullshit has depleted my savings substantially.

    And Im not sure if im about to open up to a real person. The only reason why I can share so openly here is because im anonymous, which makes me very comfortable.

    Post #128
    1 comments
    Chapter #46

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    syncrossed

    Go to a polyclinic. Come up with some story about a broken family, huge stock/crypto losses if you are too ashamed to reveal your sex addiction, and are experiencing symptoms of major depression. Get a referral to a psych specialist at subsidised rates. It shouldnt be more than $50-$75 per session. These professionals have probably seen more fucked up shit and people than you can ever imagine. No reason to be ashamed of seeking help if you really need it.

    If you prefer counselling, it is definitely cheaper, and you dont even need to go to an acute hospital. And maybe the counsellor is a chio syt

    How you know so much bro? You got mental illness before? Honestly i feel quite ashamed to meet. Like theres this mental barrier of stigma that I cant overcome.

    I also have this irrational fear that the counseller will judge me. I mean sure, hes a professional who will uphold the professional standards of decorum during the session. But can you imagine after work he go tell his wife " Wah you know i met this 24 yr old guy look damn innocent kind but actually addicted to bonking FLs in secret?"

    Post #130
    1 comments
    Chapter #47

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    syncrossed

    Cant bear the stigma of meeting a mental health professional, but can insert your penis into a third world villager who cant even get you hard??

    You really think you would be the first 24 yr old coming in for sex addiction?

    Whoopsie-fucking-do. Now you finally understand the true nature of addiction, and the how low a man can go when it kicks in. I dont know man, this is like the darkest secret of my entire life. Only 1 priest in the entire universe knows of it and hes bound by a sacred oath.

    Post #132
    0 comments
    Chapter #48

    Just relapsed AGAIN today. Booked a new FL with no reviews, because her pictures looked good and I am a stupid man. She wasnt even hot and I didnt even enjoy the session. But at least wasnt a landmine and I could get hard. As usual, after the session got some weird musky foreign worker smell on me. Not sure if the smell is native to thais, just like how indians got a certain smell lol.

    Once session over had nothing to do so went to MBS to degen. Down $900 including levy.

    Total damage for the day : -$1050

    Fuck my life.

    Post #133
    2 comments
    Chapter #49

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    timeliness

    I’d suggest you find other ways to degen rather than going to MBS. Just imagine, one trip to MBS can deprive you of multiple times of enjoyment.

    Or just use the money to spend on dome L la.

    No offence bro, this is a loser mentality.

    Only low ses people prefer to visit prostitute over mbs for degen. Go MBS at least can have entertainment for few hours and got chance to win. Donate $150 to government(for nation building purposes lol) better than donating to a whore. MBS is also a safe and clean environment, unlike cheonging where location is often unhygienic + got risk of stds.

    But ya cheonging financial downside is limited, unlike gambling which is unlimited if you got no discipline.

    Post #136
    2 comments
    Chapter #50

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    syncrossed

    Trollolol

    Lol. Mindset of a gambler. Lose 1k on gambling? No problem. Spend a few hundred on other things? Tohhhhh.

    But to be honest my savings really depleted liao. Less than 10k now.

    Post #139
    0 comments