Hi, not really a newbie here but I’ve Never sign up an account to read. However some basic intro about myself. I’m pretty young but alr a mum of 2 kiddos. One infant and one toddler. Married with my hubby for 3 years together for about 5 years.
I’ve been reading -wife and sex- Going through the motion and I realize some hubby is really unhappy with wifey not giving sex.
However I myself have to admit that aft my #2 my sex drive really have a drastic changes especially right now. Maybe due to after giving birth may lower women’s libido or plainly because I’m over tired from the stress from taking care of kids.
My question is, Is sex really that important in a marriage? My husband is really high sex drive and i admit that sometimes errr nope i mean everytime he intiate sex whenever i reject he will be unhappy with me and show me the “Sian” face. However one thing I don’t understand if we are really really not in the mood for sex how are we suppose to react? Are we suppose to ACT like we want it or simply reject Cause we REALLY don’t want it.
I admit, sometimes hubby ask me for sex no mattwr how unwilling i am i will just try my best to entertain him for that good 30mins. However my husband take a loong time to shoot sometimes in purpose to drag the time.
Maybe it only applies to me but I don’t understand, who the heck say last longer in sex means he very good in sex? However no complains about my my husband sex skills or what..just plainly curious why is SEX that important. Thanks (:
Hi,
I think that there is really no point in your question of asking why is sex really important. It is subjective. Some have it high, others low. In your case, you don’t find it important, but your hubby does. The question I think u should be asking yourself is what u are willing to do to balance the 2 extremes. Likewise another question I would ask u is that since sex is unimportant to you, why not give him free rein to do what he wants sexually as long as he is being responsible doing it? Based on how you framed your question, your answer will no doubt be a resounding NO. You will think of many reason why it is so, then I’d ask you again… Is sex really important ?
I’ve ever heard of wife divorce hubby coz hubby not performing well enough and active enough on bed…I married my wife 30-40% coz she gave good sex compared to all my ex…even after having 1 baby she’s still good…
Hi,
Agree with Bro Demonic, the matter is so subjective and it seems the ball is in your court. From your husband point of view, sex with you is so important for him. I have heard from so many seniors that good and active sex life make relationship strong. And I bet, men urge to have sex almost instant and anytime, so you got to balance that also. Understand it will be tiring to have good sex after whole-day entertaining your kids and household activities, but if you have the will you may find a way. You may get some good supplements for yourself for example. Hope this will help.
Take care
Quote:
Originally Posted by
inkthatsmile
Hi, not really a newbie here but I’ve Never sign up an account to read. However some basic intro about myself. I’m pretty young but alr a mum of 2 kiddos. One infant and one toddler. Married with my hubby for 3 years together for about 5 years.
I’ve been reading -wife and sex- Going through the motion and I realize some hubby is really unhappy with wifey not giving sex.
However I myself have to admit that aft my #2 my sex drive really have a drastic changes especially right now. Maybe due to after giving birth may lower women’s libido or plainly because I’m over tired from the stress from taking care of kids.
My question is, Is sex really that important in a marriage? My husband is really high sex drive and i admit that sometimes errr nope i mean everytime he intiate sex whenever i reject he will be unhappy with me and show me the “Sian” face. However one thing I don’t understand if we are really really not in the mood for sex how are we suppose to react? Are we suppose to ACT like we want it or simply reject Cause we REALLY don’t want it.
I admit, sometimes hubby ask me for sex no mattwr how unwilling i am i will just try my best to entertain him for that good 30mins. However my husband take a loong time to shoot sometimes in purpose to drag the time.
Maybe it only applies to me but I don’t understand, who the heck say last longer in sex means he very good in sex? However no complains about my my husband sex skills or what..just plainly curious why is SEX that important. Thanks (:
women love to talk…. why is talking important?
how abt shopping?
anyway.. men are programmed like this… its just like asking why men sucks at multi tasking
pandas may go extinct cos they hv problem hvg sex…
Quote:
Originally Posted by
inkthatsmile
Hi, not really a newbie here but I’ve Never sign up an account to read. However some basic intro about myself. I’m pretty young but alr a mum of 2 kiddos. One infant and one toddler. Married with my hubby for 3 years together for about 5 years.
welcome to this forum, here you will find many members who have the ability to offer excellent advice. enjoy the ride!
Are you giving ur hubby a chance to eat.. I not sure how your hubby handle you when u keep rejecting sex request.. but just that when we guys really need it, that sexual hormones are driving us for it.. so its kind of bad when we cant get what we want.. end up sometimes need to force it which end up turn bad.. from point of ur view, I understand that taking care of ur childrens probably giving u stress especially nowadays need two income sources.. so I suggest u really had a talk with your hubby heart to heart..
Do let him understand your work stress and children stress… see how each of u can accommodate each other… just wan let u know once you two really cut off the sex thingy, its will be tough to find them back again and you both will feel like strangers living in same house.
Well Sex for me is still important as i think it natural for guys to release sex but if wife reject meaning that the wife does not luv him more and for gals do you wanna your husband to go out to prositute to get SEX ? I dont think so right ! so sometime you will have to give in and most prob is that give him a great blow job with strong suction maybe a CIM and it would stop his sex drive dfor at least 3 days without thinking of more sex… my point of view
Quote:
Originally Posted by
inkthatsmile
Hi, not really a newbie here but I’ve Never sign up an account to read. However some basic intro about myself. I’m pretty young but alr a mum of 2 kiddos. One infant and one toddler. Married with my hubby for 3 years together for about 5 years.
I’ve been reading -wife and sex- Going through the motion and I realize some hubby is really unhappy with wifey not giving sex.
However I myself have to admit that aft my #2 my sex drive really have a drastic changes especially right now. Maybe due to after giving birth may lower women’s libido or plainly because I’m over tired from the stress from taking care of kids.
My question is, Is sex really that important in a marriage? My husband is really high sex drive and i admit that sometimes errr nope i mean everytime he intiate sex whenever i reject he will be unhappy with me and show me the “Sian” face. However one thing I don’t understand if we are really really not in the mood for sex how are we suppose to react? Are we suppose to ACT like we want it or simply reject Cause we REALLY don’t want it.
I admit, sometimes hubby ask me for sex no mattwr how unwilling i am i will just try my best to entertain him for that good 30mins. However my husband take a loong time to shoot sometimes in purpose to drag the time.
Maybe it only applies to me but I don’t understand, who the heck say last longer in sex means he very good in sex? However no complains about my my husband sex skills or what..just plainly curious why is SEX that important. Thanks (:
IMHO
Your husband married you to have 100% of your time and love (5hrs a day excl. sleep/work[he thought so]), so in a month works out to around 60hrs and sex every other day
in reality,
with kids,work ,others you are lucky to be to giving 10 hrs a month of your time to him, which is much lower to what he expected
and with 10hrs and 21 days/month(menses,not your fault) and what is going to happen to the passion between two of you ,and how many opportunities for sex will he get?
IMHO
therefore he will feel deprived, and will want to have sex with you whenever there is an opportunity
don’t be frustrated , put yourself in his shoes and you can understand him better
“Men need sex to feel loved, women need to feel loved before sex”
guys will tend to help out in the hope of tat reward. However once this reward chain is broken its a vicious cycle.
Guy realize no reward, gives less love, women feel less love then hv lesser sex and on it goes.
In short, do start the positive ball rolling. Satisfy him, then he responds positively and reward him. Sex dun hv to b 30 min. Let him know if this is a quickie just for him or on special occasion be tat horny lady that you once were before reality and kids set in