P.S it’s nightqueen’s friend here. this is a real story.. i have no idea how it could be so dramatic either, i wished life was a little more smoother but no.. i cant help it..
I have no idea if i can complete this story in one go either…(most of it i written randomly and drafted it in my mail.. so its more of a copy and paste till the ending..) but if i dont complete it.. i probbaly wont be able to finish it up anytime soon… or might not even be able to finish it…
here goes.
When i was younger.. I had a boyfriend, lets call him Joel. we were together for about a year, and he was really sweet and nice although having a high sex drive, and i was wanting to keep it for wedding. i had that kind of a mindset. so for the first few months we were together, furthest we went was heavy petting and i was insistant cause i was still really young.
few months into the relationship he started to bring me go drinking even tho i was a bad drinker, and he’d introduce me to his friends and so on. i went along cause i thought that was the way to get to know him better. and i was happy enough with him. he’d come ovr to my house and help us with housework and so on (my dad left us and theres only me, mum and my sis at home and having him around was good for the heavy work sometimes). my family likes him too. evryone think hes nice and im lucky to have gotten him.
one night we went drinking with his friends as usual, and he made me drink really alot. i was a bad drinker and just a few cups can get me into a really slump mode. that night, i wasnt sure how much i drank and what realy happened but when i woke up, he was on top of me and i felt a sharp pain from my below. i screamed for him to stop but he just covered my mouth and keep hushing me telling me its alright, and i remembered crying while looking at the ceiling of i dont know where either at that moment. (of course later on i found out its one of the budget hotels). after he finished up and cum inside me, he didnt bother to even assure me but instead turned ovr to his side of the bed and sleep whereas i was still thinking what the hell just happened.
life went on, he started using that night as an excuse to continue having sex saying theres no use to keep anything for marriage anymore cause theres nothing to keep. we had sex few times a week, sometimes at his place, sometimes at mine and sometimes even in public. he loved showing me off to people and sometimes i think i ts really uncomfortable but went along cause i really wanted to just be with him.
time goes by and he started to change, to show his true colours… he started gambling and got into debts, and started making loans from me.. our sex life increased because whenever he’;s unhappy he;d take it out on me, sometimes even hitting me in the process and calling me names like slut or whatever.. he said it excites him. i really wasnt enjoying but he’d start scolding me or something again..
things came to a turning point one day when he suddenly came to me crying and pleading with me, telling me hes in deep shit with the money lenders and i had to help him.. so i asked him how and he said to become a FL. i was stunned by his suggestion and rejected but he kept crying and kneeling to plead with me. finally i agreed after he promised it will be a short term thing and that he wont leave me but instead will marry me.
life as a FL was more difficult than i thought it would be, the emotional barrier was too much for me to take. he’d bring me to different hotels and tell me the room number den leave me alone to go up, and 2 hrs later fetch me to the next place. i didnt know who i was gonna be having sex with or what kind of treatment i was expecting. i met nice people whom’d ask why do i look so unhappy and i met horrible people that expects me to behave like animals or so.
things went on for few days until one day he brought me to a private housing and told me that this client was a friend of his and that can be trusted thus explains the venue. i stupidly went in, and saw a man sitting at the sofa. he instructed me to sit with him which i did. and before i knew he had his hands all over me. i still wasnt used to all of this and he took a towel to cover my eyes and tell me he like it that way.
before i knew i felt other hands around me as well so i struggled. but when i started struggling they got rough as well and i felt myself being lifted up and next thrown on some soft surface like a mattress. i tried screaming but my mouth was covered and muffed, i could only make muffing noises and when the towel was off my face, i saw 5 man around me, all naked and laughing at me. 2 was holding my hands down and 2 was holding my legs apart with a man shaking his cock at me and laughing, calling me dirty names.
it was like a scene out of some porn movie and i was the actress. just that its not a show.
i was struggling but not strong enough at all to free myself from them, and i found myself getting stripped stark naked right in front of the 5 man before they tied my hands to the side of the bed and continue looking at me smiling. i felt hands all over me, i tried kicking but my kicks was nothing at all, they pinned me down easily and continue touching me all over. i was devastated and tears was falling but no one wld do anything to stop.
one of the man took a video cam out and place it at the table, filming everything, another took a camera and took shots of me, opening up my pusys lips and squeezing my breasts, do all kind of pose on me.. i tried to scream for them to stop, tried to cry but nothing was helpful at all.
they forced me to blow for them and one cum right into my mouth, i wanted to spit it out but he forced it right down for me. i remmeber the others laughing at him for not being able to control and he got so angry he slapped me. the others continue touching and lickign me all over.
the taste was making me vomit. the situation was nothing erotic at all. it felt like a combination of sex and sweat and cum and i was feeling totally sick about it. i was getting wet, its a normal body reaction i knew, and they wer laughing about it saying i was enjoying. but no part of me was enjoying at all.
one by one they enter me, i was screaming but no one cares as usual. the untie me and with one man holding each of my hand, the other man doggy me and force himself into my ass. i screamed in pain but they just laugh and laugh. it was like being torn right apart. the man whom cum earlier on start takign the video cam and film like thers no tomorrow. my tears and screams.. everything caught on tape.
i was made to sit on one of the guy and with the other doing me in the ass. 2 cocks in me but nothing was enjoyable at all. i hated sex at that moment. i knew struggling was no use and i just wanted them to finish everything. one by one they cum right into me with no condom at all.
when everything was finished, all i remember was them throwing me into the washroom and asking me to clean up within 10 minutes cause they have friends coming and i had to go. my clothes was wet and stained with their cum and my own blood.
i went out of the house and my so call boyfriend, or rather pimp was there waiitng for me. i asked if he knew what was going to happen and he pretend he didnt know. he said he only took the money for one guy. and when i wanted him to approach them to take back the photos and videos, he rejected and kept finding excuses. i was so angry but nothing i cld do, i just wanted him to send me home.
from that day on, i didnt talked to him nor anyone. i told him i no longer want to do FL. i didnt know what those man was going to do with my videos or photos and i didnt dare to think or tell anyone.
a month later, my period was late and i bought a test kit. my biggest nightmare came true.
i was pregnant.
hmmm…one kind of rice will feed hundred types of people, some people may met someone nice, some don’t. in your case, your “boyfriend” met some one nice, but you don’t…yup, thats life..just like kairin and me, though she is married…ya…
Cheer up~
Cheers,
Ron
i was devastated. i tried killing myself. cutting my own wrist and so on. i dare not take pills cause i felt it was afterall a baby inside me.
soon my sister felt something wrong and kept nailing me so i had no choice but to tell her cause i was really falling apart. after finding out about where those man stayed, she and her friend went to approach them. i dont know what method she used or what happened between them… she manage to take back the photos and video and made them sign an agreement not to tell anyone about what happened..
she came back, asking me what do i want to do. to keep the baby or to abort it. i was only 18 and i didnt know what should happen. my sister made the decision for me to have an abortion and mum was kept in the dark because she wasnt in good health.
the operation was more than just a operation.
i remembered watching the whole video about abortions before the operation and it was a torment to my mind. when i woke up, they told me everything’s done. but that was in the medical terms.
in my own mind, in my own heart. nothing was done and nothing was gone. i have just killed my own baby and even though he/she wasnt a fruit of love, the baby was innocent too. i was so devastated. really devastated. i locked myself up and cried and cried and cried. i dotn know how many days i did that. my sister told me everything’s fine and even arranged to bring me to a holiday in japan with her friend.
evryone tried hard to make me stay strong and hold on. and i was trying to too btu whenever i close my eyes i could hear my own baby cry. it was like.. issit really my fault? issit wrong to trust and want to help someone you love?
You shouldnt trusted Joel by doing FL just for him to
get the money.
If I were you, make a police report.
shortly after the operation, my sister and her friend brought me to japan for a short holiday. they wanted to cheer me up and wanted me to pick myself up cause i was so locking myself up.
the trip was nice, and they even brought me to one of the gigolo clubs here and had pure drinking fun. it was supposed to be a nice relaxing trip but i didnt really expect that to be the start of another nightmare.
one night we went to one of the clubs and drank the whole night away with the guys. i wasnt too comfortable with the thought of even having a guy near me. but still it was fun being out with them and i drank pretty much too. my sister was smitten by one of the guys in the shop, tatsuya. my sister and her friend could communicate in japanese so there werent any problem.
the next day, we headed to kyoto, had decent fun. shopping and walking around.. them bringing me to nice food and shoppign sprees… i was slowly picking myself up even tho at night i still hear my baby cries.
when we returned to singapore, i thought life could slowly get back to normal. but i was wrong.. the trip was a mistake to begin with. my sister was eventually changing.
she was spending more and more time talking to tatsuya on the phone, chalking up high bills and mails, and she’d buy stuff like LV or gucci to send over to him cause he likes it.
my sister had always been a really strong headed woman whom knew what she wants and is strong against what she doesnt want. i always admired and looked up to her cause she was never smitten by any man she met. she had suitors of course but she had never met anyone good enough for her to be smitten with or fall in love with.
i remember the day before everything happened she actually got me to her room and have a heart to heart talk with me. (i know this aint sexy and thers nothing arousing but still wanna share it with u guys…)
sis : sometimes in life.. you meet people you regret meeting, but sometimes.. you meet people you wished you could have a lifetime with.
me : tatsuya? (i knew she was smitten over him, but also.. cause of the past i was really careful with man)
sis : i have no idea. but life is filled with chapters.. you have your own chapters too vi, when a chapter closes.. open another chapter and forget about the past.. ok?
me : if only it was so easy. would you forget the past when a new chapter opens?
sis : yup.. i will… when i decide to start a new chapter… the past will be past.
me : do you have your past too?
sis : of course. we all have pasts.. maybe one day, you will find yourself where i am now too. but for now.. remember, stay strong.
the next day my sister was gone, laeving behind a note sayign she’s heading over to japan cause she wanted to see tatsuya, and asking us not to worry about her. there was no saying whatsoever when she would be back.
with my sister gone, life at home because worst. mum’s health was getting worst and my studies was taking its toll on me too. i couldnt concentrate and had to work part time as well to sustain the home with my mum.
i had to convince my mum that my sis was gonna be alright even tho she doesnt even give us a call. she had a good friend, yw and sometimes i would ask if she know whats going on, initially my sister would contact her and tell her that shes with tatsuya and everything’s fine but after few weeks there was no more mails from her either.
during that period of time, life was a chore to me. livign itself was a chore. to fast forward.. i was still having illusions at night about baby crying and sometimes i had bad dreams.
there was totally no news from my sister and i didnt know anything about how she was doing over in japan and my mum kept asking about her, wanting to see her. i couldnt stand the stress and started drinking and smoking, which i never liked. life was always about drinking. until one day yw just came to me and gave me a slap, like waking me up from thsoe drinking days.
i told her i wanted to come to japan, cause i wanted to look for my sister. i needed to know what was going on, how could someone suddeny turn her back and change in a sudden.
few days later, promising my mum that i;d find out what was going on and would bring her back.. i left for japan.
p.s. guess im unable to continue alread.. to fast forward, there was another rape case and im pregnant again but now ive been bleeding since last night. im not in singapore and i really dont dare to tell anyone… situation is worst den i can ever imagine now..
no idea wads going to happen.hopefully i can finish up this story..
and to one of the SBF bro whom have been guiding me along all this while.. i really want to tell him how thankful i am and although this might be the end ofor me… i just want to let him know how appreciate i am.
love.
vivien.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
nightqueen
i really want to tell him how thankful i am and although
this might be the end of me…
i just want to let him know how appreciate i am.
love.
vivien.
Please don’t do anything silly. You need to see a counselor. Do you have any info on who raped u? Pls make a police report if u do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
stairway
Please don’t do anything silly. You need to see a counselor. Do you have any info on who raped u? Pls make a police report if u do.
i dont know where is he now…