My Struggle


    Chapter #1

    I took a step out from the heavy metal gate, hearing a loud “clung” behind me. I tilted my head slightly upwards, taking in a super long breath of the outside world, savouring the smell of freshly cut grass and tar roads under the baking sun. Noises coming from cars and sounds of bird wings flapping never felt so good before. I looked down at my left ankle. Tied around it was a black watch like device. It felt heavy, super heavy.

    I turned around, looking at the building that I’ve once “resided” for 3 years. It looked so magnificent and yet dominating. Just by looking at the gate, you can simply tell that that place tells stories of thousands of people. Yes, that’s prison and I just got out of it.

    I was still reminiscing what just happened in there for the past 3 years and a loud familiar voice thundered across the road. “ OI! AH GIRL”.

    I turned around, startled. There he is, standing across the road looking at me smiling, seemingly waiting for the cars to pass by before crossing the road to me.

    Yes, “ah girl” is the nickname I earned because of my looks. People said I have sharp features for a male, resembling a Eurasian girl. That is how the “lao puays” describe me and gave me that nickname. I felt ashamed of it at first but as my title and name got bigger within the gang, I gradually felt proud of it and used it with pride.

    Standing in front of me now is “orh jiao” (black bird), my “tang case” who got released 2 months before me. Behind him was “xiaobai”, one of our brothers, and a bunch of younger people whom I’ve not seen before.

    Xiaobai greeted me with a tight hug and countless painful hard pats on my back.

    “welcome back hia di eh”, said Xiaobai and the bunch of younger looking people greeted me with my nickname, each one taking turns to shake hands with me.

    “You still look back for what? Wanna go back “peh” 3 more years is it?” Orh jiao said with a cheeky smile

    “Siao ah? Why don’t you go back? That place can keep you fit and not fat.” I retorted with a cheeky smile too.

    Before we got caught, orh jiao is a slightly bigger than medium sized guy with a full left sleeve colourful tattoo and xiaobai is both hands half sleeve with a fireball on his forehead. Now orh jiao is looking more fit than usual with chest and triceps bulging, thanks to the exercise we do secretly in cell and yard time.

    “Where’s Joshua?” I asked.

    “He’s waiting for you at geylang”, replied orh jiao.

    Joshua is our “Zhong eh” (headman). He’s about my height, standing at 168-170cm, buffed at 90+kg. Everything about him tells anyone he’s not someone you want to mess with. From his hair, to his face, his stares, his body size, his tattoo. Everything about him spelt either “v-i-c-e” or “g-a-n-g-s-t-e-r”, the sort the transcom will not let go without a thorough screening.

    Me? I’m 168, very lightly tanned, about 80kg (since the last time I checked) with 2 full sleeves tattoo, one big chest piece, all with nice workmanship and colours.

    How I got myself in this state and how I became involved with the underworld? It had to all go back to when I was secondary 1…

    Post #1
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    Chapter #2

    I was from one of the most notorious all boys school from the east. Well, contrary to the belief, there weren’t much gays in the school but more rugged boys and boys who aren’t afraid of speaking the mind, be it about sex or vulgarities, due to the fact that we do not have girls in the school and we do not hold back. Luckily, there’s also an all-girl’s school within a stone’s throw and another all-girl’s school within 20mins bus ride from where we are, to balance out our raging hormones.

    On my first month of school, everything is normal and I was still that small petite boy who minded my own business and kept to myself. Like a goody two shoes, I complete my home work on time, joined the NPCC as my cca and pretty much lead the life of how a student would be.

    I was from the express stream due to affiliations with my primary school, which is also an all-boys school. Yes, it will be 10 years of boys school and my relatives are surprised that it did not turn me gay or into a monk.

    Made new friends along the way and I started to open up, chatting in class and telling my neighbouring tables lame jokes while teachers are teaching.

    6 months down the road is where everything took a downhill and I wasn’t prepared for this change. I remembered it was recess time and I was queueing up for my usual beehoon at the school canteen when suddenly, a big burly modern sikh guy, short hair and long pants, presumably upper sec student, cut my queue.

    “hey, go queue up” I said with frustration.

    “Shut up before I punch your face!” he retorted and turn back to face the stall.

    Given the size difference, I naturally sulk and “lan lan suck thumb”, letting him cut my queue. He’s at least 2 heads taller than me with shoulders at least twice my shoulder length. Mind you, back then I was still going through puberty and I’m only a maximum of 150cm. There’s nothing I could do. Suddenly a few of his friend joined the queue to chat with him and I heard his name. Melvinder. Yes, that’s his name. I took a mental note and I remember his face.

    After that incident, everything seemed to be back to normal. Teachers piling up our homework and my bag got heavier with the number of books, files and papers I need to carry to and fro.

    One Thursday, I was walking to my usual bus stop after school and from far, I saw that big burly sikh guy, Melvinder, and his usual gang.

    “shit”, I muttered.

    As I walked nearer to the bus stop, one of his friends elbowed Melvinder and nod upwards towards my direction…

    Post #2
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    Chapter #3

    Melvinder stood up and gestured me to walk towards him.

    “Eh bastard! Who say you can use this bus stop?” Melvinder questioned.

    Me getting fed up, I replied, “ Eh fatty, why I cannot use this bus stop? This bus stop your ah gong buy to sleep here one ah?”

    With that remark, his whole lot stood up and surrounded me and shoved me, saying I’m very “guai lan” and challenged me to a fight.

    Honestly, I was shaking with fear but this time round, I was determined to show this fat Melvinder that he cannot always get what he wanted.

    Melvinder: “ eh all gostan! This one I settle myself can already!”

    With that, he waved a punch at my left and I back stepped and I tried to give him a push kick. He caught my leg with both his hands. He then attempted to straight my leg and break my leg by elbowing my knee and joint but I skipped forward with 3 small steps, my right hand went for his face.

    “pik”, came the sound of my right punch. It was weak I know but that infurated Melvinder as his spectacles flew to the road. I punched his face once more and it landed on his ear. I felt my wrist going sour from the impact of the punch since I tried to punch harder and it feel more like an hook + uppercut since he’s so much taller. That’s it, wrong angle of throwing a punch and I doubt I can punch again in the next 1 week. I confirmed that I’ve sprained my right wrist.

    Melvinder looked at me with face at red as an overly ripe tomato and he let go of my leg and shoved me really hard, causing me to hit the bus stop advertisement board with a loud thud. Suddenly, I saw many different hands and legs raining blows on me. Yes, I kena “comb” by all of them. I just simply squat down and curl my body up, covering my neck and head. After 2 minutes, they stopped in exhaustion.

    Melvinder squat down in front of me, panting and said in between breath, “don’t let me see you at this bus stop again. I see one time, beat you one time.”

    “pui”, he spat at me before walking away with his gang.

    They were still talking among themselves, saying stuff like “later he go complain to Mr Dopson how?”, “Still say can settle yourself but kena punch until specs drop” etc.

    As they walked further away, I slowly stood up, massaging my aching and swollen arms and legs, thanking my limbs for helping me shield relentless attacks, tidied my uniform that was in disarray and tried to dust off and footprints that could be obvious and visible.

    Then, I noticed there are large groups of students of my school from across the road at another bus stops looking at me with looks of concern and talking among themselves. However, there were 4 students in long pants with I took particular notice of. They were talking among themselves and one look at them, I knew they are not good people as their hairstyle, stares, the way they wear the uniform, their vibes tells me they are gangsters too. Just as I was about to adjust my bag straps, I saw the 4 of them walking towards me with the “ao 386”.

    “not again”, I muttered under my breath.

    When they reached me, I immediately said, “please, I just got beaten up, I don’t want to fight or get..”

    I was cut away by, “ relax la brother. We come here to check on you. Are you ok?”

    “ wah buay pai leh, kena whack until so jialat still never kena the face. Confirm block until gao lat gao lat.” Another one added.

    With that, the one with the most outstanding hairstyle of slightly spiky hair with long tail and long sideburn patted my left arm.

    “OW! PAIN LA FUCK!”, I exclaimed with a bit of frustration and anger.

    The one with long sideburn put his arms around me and offered to buy me a meal. I brushed off his arms rudely and said, “I just kena whacked. You think I got mood to eat?”

    I looked at him with frustration and just nice, my bus came along and I hopped on it. While my bus moved off, I looked out of the window and saw the 4 of them waving goodbye at me. I turned away and put my head down…

    Post #3
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    Chapter #4

    Needless to say, I received a lot of questions of concern from my mom when I reached home. I did not utter a word and went straight to the bathroom. I turned on the shower with my uniform still on and I stood under it for a good 15 mins before I start to take off my wet and dirty uniform and start actually showering. Once I’m done and exited the bathroom, my mom wanted to ask me questions again and I cut her off by asking her to leave me alone and I went off to complete the homework that the e maths and chemistry teacher had assigned and head off to sleep without even eating.

    The next day, my mom woke up earlier than me to prepare a simple sandwich and some milo for me. As I walked in to the living room, fully changed, she stopped me and said, “I know you got into a fight and got badly beaten up. Whatever it is, never disappoint mummy and never turn bad.”

    This almost brought a tear to my eyes and I saw how worried and concerned she looked when she saw the bruises on my arms while trying to rub it. I gave her a hug and left for school, still feeling the ache from my arms and legs and my heart.

    During morning assembly, I heard my principal announced, “Will the following students from 4T1 please report to my office now: Joshua Wee, Jasper Kong, Ng Wei Kang and Tan Boon Leng. Please report now to my office. For the rest of you, you may all now leave for your classes.”

    Students started standing up and forming up to head to the classrooms led by the form teachers and I noticed 4 students in long pants walking at another direction. My heart pounded when I saw the 4 of them being the ones who came to talk to me after I got beaten up. They walked towards the principal office with the “ao 386” and in my head, I was trying to register which one of them fits which names.

    Fast forward to recess time, I queued up for my usual beehoon and sat down alone at the first bench in front of the stall. Before I could start digging in, I saw 4 shadows hovering around me. I looked up and saw the 4 of them from yesterday, smiling at me.

    “how? Feeling better already?” asked the guy with the long sideburn.

    I shrugged my shoulders and started eating. They sat down around me, asking a series of questions which I don’t bother to reply.

    “My name is Joshua.” The one with long sideburn introduced himself with and extended arm seemingly asking for a handshake. I looked at him for a good 2 seconds before shaking his hand.

    “I’m Jun Hao.” I replied, with some food in my mouth.

    “Eh cb, swallow first then talk leh. I’m Jasper.”, the guy with and inner shirt inside his school uniform with normal hair style but with a bad guy face with thick eyebrows.

    “I’m Boon Leng and he’s Wei Kang.” Said the slightly plump guy spotting an offbeat center parting with long entails.

    “Nbcb you steal my line for fuck.” Came from Wei Kang, who is similarly plump but on the leaner side, with also center parting but without long entails. “hehehe we’re cousins” pointing and Boon Leng and himself to and fro.

    “What if I tell you, you can take revenge on the fat fuck who beat you up yesterday? Would you be interested?” Joshua asked.

    I almost choked on my beehoon and started coughing. That sent the 3 of them laughing but Joshua unmoved and expressionless. With a stern and fierce look on his eyes, he asked again.

    “ will you be interested?”

    “I..I..I’m not sure..” I stammered in doubt

    “Don’t think so much. You want to get back at them or not? Jit gu wei. (means one firm confirmation in hokkien)”

    I looked down at my beehoon, deep in thought for the consequences and what could have happen if revenge goes wrong.

    “I take this silence as a yes.” Joshua said.

    With a wave of his hand, the 3 of them followed Joshua’s lead and took off…

    Post #4
    1 comments
    Chapter #5

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    Tai_zi21

    Surprise no 1 comment on ur thread yet…

    Looks like it ur own story ya?

    Hoping to see new updates and keep it coming

    Always love to see a true story here

    Semi fiction hahaha! I’ll leave the decision to the readers to believe which is true 🤣

    Post #6
    1 comments
    Chapter #6

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    funfox

    Keep going bro bruce. Nice start 👍🏼

    Thank you bro. Will post the next update when I’m more free from work. Cheers!

    Post #8
    4 comments
    Chapter #7

    After that exchange, the rest of the day pass by pretty normal. Somehow or rather, my brains kept rehearsing what Joshua said and I kept thinking about the endless possibilities of his statement.

    Will there be a big fight? Will Joshua get beaten up like me? I shook my head to the thought of Joshua getting beaten up as he doesn’t look like the kind who would be eaten alive.

    “BRRRIIIIIINNNNNKKKKKKKK!!!!”

    I was jolted from my thought of the school bell that signifies the end of the long school day. Positive thoughts filled my mind again and I thought of the stuff I could do with my neighbourhood friends and what would my mom cook over the weekend. Just as I was to exit the classroom, Jasper held on to my bruised and swollen arm tightly and dragged me along.

    “Follow me.” That’s all he said.

    “Ow! Still pain leh, lighter can or not?” I replied, gesturing to him that he had grabbed on to my bruised spot. He ignored me and dragged me to a secluded corner behind the DnT building.

    Nearing to the back of the building, I could hear shouts of anger and blows being exchanged.

    “pik pok pik pok pok pik pok pok”

    When I reached with Jasper, what I saw literally shook me.

    I saw 3 angry people beating up 5 angry and helpless people. As you’ve guessed, the 3 angry people beating up other 5 people are Joshua, Boon Leng and Wei Kang.

    “YOU LIKE TO BULLY SMALLER SIZED PEOPLE RIGHT?? NOW IM HERE, SMALLER SIZE THAN YOU. YOU GOT BALLS YOU BULLY ME ALSO LA PCB!!!!”

    “PIK” came a loud thud of fist onto face.

    “OI REPLY ME LEH!! JUST NOW TALK LIKE TIGER NOW BECOME HELLO KITTY SIBO?”

    Melvinder, : “FUCK YOU JOSHUA! YOU THINK YOU XX9 ONE VERY BIG IS IT?”

    “YES! IF NOT WHY NOW I’M BEATING YOU AND YOU CAN’T EVEN TOUCH ME???”, thundered Joshua.

    There was a moment of silence and intense staring between the 2 groups and I was just there, watching. Out of a sudden, Joshua broke away from the intense stare and turned towards me.

    “come here bro.” signaling me to go over with his left hand.

    “come here, bian gia (don’t be afraid)”

    “now, I want you to punch this fat fuck like how he beat you up yesterday. I want you to spit back at him. Do it. Go on.” Joshua told me calmly, tilting his head slightly to the right.

    “err..rrr..no need la..” I said nervously, looking at Melvinder, whose face had already started to swell, corner of lips broken and bleeding, hair in a big clump of mess and spectacles lenses broken. Oh, not forgetting that obvious foot print on the left of his face.

    “SCARED WHAT? HE BEAT YOU THAT TIME HE ALSO NOT SCARED!” Jasper suddenly shouted across.

    Jasper then shoved me nearer to Melvinder and his sidekicks and prompted me again to beat them up one by one.

    Joshua walked up to my ear and whispered, “imagine they just killed your parents…” and winked at me, tilting his head towards his right once more…

    Post #13
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    Chapter #8

    Walking nervously to Melvinder who’s on the floor right now, I looked at him for a good 10 seconds before I unleashed the attacks. With a swift motion, I plunged my right foot on Melvinder’s nose with a hard smashing sound. I flew into a frenzy, stomping and kicking on his face since I’ve sprained my wrist punching him yesterday. After I was done kicking him, I turned to the others who’s also on the floor, giving a free kick to one skinny guy’s head and stomping on his chest and the rest of the 3 also received my merciless stomps and kick to the head, face and chest. It took about 5 mins before Joshua told me to stop and held me back, effortlessly.

    “Spit on that fatty.” Joshua said.

    I walked up to him, limping a little from the attacks and accumulated one big lump of thick phglem and released it on Melvinder’s face.

    “kaaakkkk-PUI!”

    Honestly speaking, I would feel disgusted with the quantity and quality of the spit if someone were to do that to me.

    “OOOFF!” the rest of Joshua and gang exclaimed.

    Joshua then went up to Melvinder, pulled his collar and told him, “This guy is now officially my ginna(underling). Now he’s also a xx9. Messing with him or avenging means you’re declaring war with all of us. Go back and tell that “san por” how useless you are. If he wants a go with us, tell him don’t waste time and faster come. We will be waiting.” Adding a kick to his forehead, Joshua pulled me along and the 5 of us walked away. I was still trembling with adrenaline and I could not shake off what just happened.

    After some distance, I asked Joshua.

    “Can I don’t join your gang? My intention is not to join your gang sia..”

    “You are now my ginna and you follow me. Understand. As long as I’m alive, I will train you to be like one of us and I guarantee no one will touch you. Don’t worry, be happy.” Joshua said with a smirk with Boon Leng, Wei Kang and Jasper congratulating me on my first “bashing of people”.

    We then head of to a mall nearby and ate some lunch with them explaining their history with Melvinder and his headman. Apparently, that “san por” Joshua was talking about had a tiff with Joshua before, over some girl from the neighbouring school. He too, was from our school but had got expelled due to his poor conduct, trouble with the authorities, not to mention his near to zero academic results. According to them, he still hangs around after school at our back door from time to time, checking up on Melvinder and his bros. I was also introduced to those that I beat up. They are Nareindran, Wee Kian, Ben and Beng Kiat. The san por? His name is Nicholas. Joshua then added that those people are from the gangs that operated at tekka and balestier area which mainly comprises of Chinese and Indians whereas for our side, it’s rojak. Chinese, Malay, Indian and even Eurasians or half ang mohs are welcome.

    For the next hour or so, the 4 of them explained to me about our gang’s history, where we operate, who were our allies and enemies.

    “Do I have to give you protection fee..?” I asked meekly.

    That question sent all of them to uncontrollable laughter.

    “Boy ah, when you’re younger, you give your father pocket money or your father give you pocket money? Don’t siao la, we don’t practice that here. Anyway, next week, meet me at backgate of the school after Friday. I intro you to some of our own people in our school and I’ll bring you somewhere. Bring some home clothes to change out.” Said Joshua.

    I nodded my head and I got startled by a loud “BOO”. I looked up and I saw 3 girls in pinafore standing at our table. Joshua and Jasper warmly welcomed them to join us with Boon Leng and Wei Kang whispering among themselves about the 2 girls behind.

    That is where I knew Celeste, the girl that made me feel like fucking her, even in my dreams…

    Post #14
    4 comments
    Chapter #9

    Quote:

    Originally Posted by

    Peacekeeping

    Revenge is always sweet. I hope there will be more clashes with Melvinder haha. Next time make him jiak sai

    Yes! It will actually happen but its further back in the story.

    Post #19
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    Chapter #10

    For those who up my points, I wish you all Heng Heng, strike whatever number you buy and get whatever pussy you like. HUAT AH!

    Post #20
    3 comments