Chapter 56
Previously in Chap 55… concludes my 19 YO birthday…
Fast forward to another 3 more months… it was already the third year of our poly. Angel successfully graduate while I had to stay back for 2 more semester (1 more year) because I failed some modules and had to retake.
Family condition continued to improve as my dad got another new contract. I still work part-time but only work 2 to maximum 4 days a week. Angel decided to pursue her dreams in arts and enrolled into Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts. I can’t remember the course but I believe it was an advance diploma.
She was the one who got even busier than I am. The requirements of her work was so much stricter than what she went through in poly many times she work till midnight and her work is yet to be completed. There were times she would suddenly wake up in her study room realising she fell asleep while working only to continue again when she woke up.
(She remains beautiful even when sleeping…)
The stress was so much she finds herself crying some times when she couldn’t cope. As a 24/7 boyfriend I did my best to accompany her. Got her supper, even accompanied by her side while she was working while I did my own studying. But I remember feeling really helpless being unable to help her at all in any of her school related work.
Fast forward to another 6 more months… Angel was coping better after a semester. But again the standards got even higher and she was required to work in groups now. There were couple of times she needed to stay over in campus along with her group mates to complete their project. I would sometimes buy supper over for her and her classmates when they were staying over in campus.
Most of her classmates were older than her. The guys were at least 2 to 3 years older than us because of NS. The girls were also older because most of them work a year or two in related fields before taking on this advance diploma.
I couldn’t mix well with some of her school mates I have met… most of the guys were always talking about NS or online games which I have not gone through or do not participate in. Conversing with the girls was still okay but I rather give my attention to Angel if I had time to converse with other girls.
But there was this particular project I remember having only 5 members… Angel, Joanne, Henry, Casper and Lawrence. Henry and Casper are the typical guys I talked about who always talk about NS and gaming… Lawrence on the other hand was the oldest in the group. I was 19 years old then and Lawrence was 28 years old. After NS he further his studies in the US and even worked there for a few years in the arts and advertisement industry before coming back to Singapore as he decided to pick up a new skills.
It was easier to talk to Lawrence because he was a lot more mature (doesn’t boast about the things he does in NS unlike other guys). He was pretty cool too in my opinion, drives a lancer and although at 28 years old his hair was even more havoc than mine… long dyed hair that he ties it into a ponytail, some tattoo and always wore ripped jeans whenever I see him.
Joanne on the other hand was the big sister Angel and I never had. Only 2 years older than us but her family background was pretty similar to mine and she has been working part-times paying off her own studies since poly too. I could relate to Joanne easily. Overall I was glad Angel met these people because they could help her in areas that I could not academically.
*End of chap*
Chapter 57
Previously in chap 56… Angel went on to take advance diploma while I stayed back 1 more year in poly.
Like other project this required Angel and the rest to occasionally stay back overnight in campus to complete work too. However they would sometimes move to Lawrence’s place to continue the project as his house is equipped with more materials for them to work on.
I wished I could write more lovey dovey days between Angel and I and it still pains me a little as I write this, Angel and I started to distance again. This time it was because of her school work. I was only meeting Angel about once or twice a week now. Most days she said she was busy with school work, when I offered to company her at her place she just there wasn’t a need because she finds it silly and stressful I just “stare” at her doing work.
They were also going to Lawrence’s place more often so I no longer bought supper for them. Once I did offer to buy supper up to Lawrence’s place but Angel refuse to give me his address. She mention there is plenty of food and it was not necessary. I offered to pick her up and send her home but she decline my offer too saying either she shares cab with Joanne or Lawrence would send everyone home with his car.
In the end I only got to see Angel about once or twice a week, sometimes maybe just a quick meal. Since we already met so little needless to say there was hardly any physical affection. Even when there were opportunities Angel would say she is not in the mood because of school. At times when I tried to “force it” we would eventually have a small quarrel over it as she accuse me of just lusting over her body and not truly loving her.
As I write this I realise how predictable my story is… most of you should be able to guess what is about to happen but the sad thing is I was either too trusting or too blinded by love back then as a teenager. My suspicion only started to arise few more months down the road and also I’ve been dropping too many missed calls to Angel. Calls that she either returns an hour or two later or the next day with the same reason… too focus in school work.
Anyway I have fast forward this story so much it is almost a year… my 20th birthday is up and coming in another 7 days. The reason is because since this happen many years ago (close to a decade), most of my memories are fuzzy but what happen next I remember very vividly…
I knew I have to talk to Angel face to face, confront her in a way to find out what is happening. A part of me was really terrified what I would find out but this couldn’t drag any longer. It was supposed to be a date night where we have already promise to meet up to have dinner at her place after which she has to get back to work.
So I made my way down on bus, on the way to Angel’s place. On my way there I had many mental roleplay how I was going to talk to her only to be interrupted by a SMS from her suddenly…
“Darling I’m so sorry the guys decided to meet last min for the project, something important crop. We will be meeting at Law’s place. So sorry I hope you are not out yet. I’ll make it up to you okay darling? Sorry sorry… forgive me k? muackz!”
I was really angry and upset with the text I called her mobile phone immediately. She did not pick up. I waited for 5 mins just to see if she called me back but there was no return call. I called again… no response. I drop her a text saying “Call me back asap darling, important”, waited for another 15mins no return calls.
I lost my patience… I told the auntie sitting next to me if I could borrow her phone to make an urgent call as something is wrong with mine. I decided to use a stranger’s number to phone Angel… I was hoping she DOES NOT pick up…
*End of chap*
Chapter 58
Previously in chap 57… I was so desperate to find Angel I had to use a stranger’s phone to call her…
Angel: Hello?
A sharp pain pierce through my heart when I heard her voice. Through the phone I also heard music playing in the background…
Angel: Hello? Hello?
I remain silent all the way throughout the call.
Angel: HELLO!? Anyone there?
The pain got worse when I heard what seem like Lawrence’s voice…
Law: What wrong’s babe… just hang up baby it could be a nuisance call…
Angel hung up … I think I have heard enough too. I told the auntie thank you and return her the phone. I used my phone again and called Angel… this time please… I was hoping she DOES pick up the phone… but again… no response… it was obvious… Angel was avoiding me…
I drop her another text… “How can you pick up a stranger’s call immediately and ignore mine the next instance…”
Angel called me back 10mins later… as she called I remember the bus has reach her home but I did not alight. I didn’t think there was a need anymore. This time there was no music in the background of the conversation… instead there was some echo. Feels like one of those calls you would make in a toilet cubicle.
Angel: Darling Yes?
Me: Where are you?
Angel: Me? We at Lawrence’s place ma… did you see my message? Sorry I last minute cannot meet you.
Me: You sure you at Lawrence’s place?
Angel: Ya
Me: Henry, Casper and Joanne all there?
Angel: Ya
Me: Can you put me to Henry?
Angel stuttered… I think she never expected me to do such a thing… I’m guessing that was also the reason why she did not want to pick up my call in the first place.
Angel: Wh..at? why?
Me: Is he there?
Angel: Yes
Me: Then put me to him I want to ask him something… I recently started to play a game want to ask him for advice…
Angel: I think he busy… now not a good time can darling
Me: Now is not a good time for him or not a good time for you?
Angel: What? What you mean…
Me: Angel… please… stop lying to me… please… just tell me the truth…
Angel started crying on the other side of the phone… she just kept saying…. I’m sorry… I’m sorry…
I was on the phone for the next 2mins just hearing her cry before I spoke again…
Me: Angel… Let’s break up…
I hung up…
*end of chap*
Chapter 59
Previously in chap 58… we broke up…
After I hung up, tears uncontrollably came down even though I was trying to hold them as much as I could as I was in the public. I shut my eyes tightly for the remaining journey not wanting to see how others were viewing me until I reach all the way till Eunos interchange.
I can’t remember how I got back home eventually in fact I can’t remember how the next few days were spent. I did not go to work nor school like an emo boy or a heart broken man you see in movies wasting life in my bedroom not wanting to do anything. I spend most of my time sleeping, cried at times… thinking about what went wrong in our relationship? It was an endless cycle for about a week.
I do remember though on my 20th birthday Angel did send me a text…
“I’m sorry for what I did Jay. Happy Birthday to you dear. How are you celebrating? Please can we meet? Let me celebrate with you =)”
I did not reply to the message at all. Looking back my experience… my 19th birthday and 20th birthday was truly heaven versus hell.
My mum eventually found out about us because the school send a letter saying my attendance was low and they were going to ban me from exams if it was lower than 70%. There was only one explanation why her son is emo-ing so badly at home, she guessed it immediately. I still remember… “Good riddance” she said. I did had the urge to quarrel with her but I held back because it was not her fault.
I went back to school again but acted like a walking zombie. I still did not work, instead I started splurging on unnecessary stuffs… I only took cab from then, I splurge on good food and even treated my friends to restaurant. In less than 3 months I spend all my savings that I accumulated over 3 years… close to 10k. I was force to go back to work again… as usual I buried myself with more work.
One day I was invited to a friend’s 21st birthday, I was thinking I needed to cheer myself up and be basked in positivity. I remember it was an evening BBQ session at East Coast Park. When I went to greet and wished the birthday boy he suddenly ask…
Bday boy: Eh why you never come with your gf wan? (that awkward and painful moment)
Me: Oh? Angel? Hmm she busy la… haha. she send her regards…
Bday boy: Bullshit… I was still texting her just now she say she on the way liao I thought she with you. Why you all boyfriend and girlfriend never coordinate one? Quarrel ar?
(Fuck… it was a mistake attending mutual friend’s event)
Me: Ya la ya la… got quarrel a bit la
I decided to leave the venue asap as I did not want to create any awkwardness only to hear a familiar voice calling me… “Hey Jay”
I turned back… it was Angel…
Bday boy: Swee! just nice you are here! Wah lau Jay you must thank me leh… use my birthday reconcile ok? You wan I got book chalet you can use also… haha… just tell me beforehand can liao…
Angel: Reconcile?
Bday boy: Haha.. nothing la…
The birthday boy went on to take Angel’s hand and mine and placing it together so we would hold hands with each other… (Awkward to the max) As much as I wanted to leave now it wasn’t possible at least for the time being (must show face to birthday boy). Worst still other mutual friends who knew us all came to say Hi and ask how we were doing some of the closer ones were even teasing us. None of them knew about our incident…
To avoid all the awkward tension I chose to take a seat at a pavilion slightly further from the BBQ pit but still in sight. And for some reason Angel followed suit… we sat at the pavilion awkwardly without talking to each other for the next 5mins I couldn’t take it and broke the silence…
Me: I’m hungry… I’m going to take some food. Do you want any?
Angel: Oh… yes please. I come with you?
Me: No no… is okay… just stay here… please
I left without waiting for her reply. While getting food for Angel I had the auto response to get all the things she like… Why am I still doing all these boyfriend duties… I asked myself… sigh…
*End of chap*
Chapter 60
Previously in chap 59… meeting Angel again… 3 months after we broke up…
Me: Here you go…
Angel: Thanks
We ate silently for the next 15mins… she had some stains on the side of her lips while eating… when we were still together I would have use tissue that I always prepare for her wiping it off even before she notice. I did had the urge to do it again but I controlled myself.
Angel: Jay… got tissue?
I kept quiet and passed her the entire packet… when she tried to return it…
Me: Is ok… keep it. You may need it again later… I have extra packet myself
Angel: Thanks…
Angel tried to strike a conversation with me for the next 10 mins but my reply was either simple one-liner or one word answers like… “Yes”, “No”, “Okay”, “Dunno” etc… Angel no doubt could sense my cold shoulders but still tried hard to talk to me.
But after a while I guess she gave up and the tension in the pavilion got worse. She saw a friend from afar and told me she would be back later and went over to talk to her. As I looked at her back view moving away from me I had that urge to tear again.
“GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!!! FUCK!!! DON”T BE SUCH A LOSER” That was what I was screaming inside… I told myself to be on the high road. Be a gentleman and don’t act like a whiny pussy. So when Angel came back about 10mins later I decided to strike conversation again… I didn’t know what to say… so I just blurted something random…
Me: So where you going later after this?
Angel was surprise with my sudden change in temperament you could see her smile instantly but frown shortly as if it was a difficult question to answer…
Angel: Erm… out… I may need to leave soon actually… maybe in less than half an hour
I immediately knew who she was going to go out with. The anger in me made me raise my voice and I said: NO!
Angel: What?
Me: Don’t go!
Angel: Jay…
Me: We need to talk…
Angel: I know… but can we do this another time? He is on his way here…
Me: I don’t care! If you can lie to me to look for him why can’t you do the same for me!!
Angel was silent for a moment her eyes was already watery…
Angel: Fine…
She left and made a phone call on the far corner of the pavilion. I couldn’t hear her conversation but only heard her starting it with “Hey baby…” A few mins later she told me she is not meeting him anymore.
Angel: So what do you want to do ow?
Me: We need to find a place to talk… in private where no one will disturb us…
Angel: Ok… where?
I really wanted to a private place for just the both of us… why because I foresee an emotional outburst for either of us… It was still early in the evening around 7 plus so public places I don’t think there is really a suitable spot… our homes are not exactly private. The only place I could think of is…
Me: Can we check-in a hotel?
Angel: What? Why?
Me: It’s the only place I can think of that is the most private… in case…
Angel: In case what?
Me: Nothing… (I can’t say in case I can’t contain myself and cry in front of you)
Angel: Can we don’t?
I don’t know how but this came to mind almost immediately to use it as a threat or favour however you call it to force Angel to agree…
Me: Remember our game last year during my birthday? Pool game you lost and the loser will have to be a servant for winner for rest of the day?
She knew what was coming… she just answered weakly: … Yes …
Me: Is it still valid? If so I want to use it… just for tonight… oh and my birthday you said you will celebrate with me (I was coming out with all sorts of lame things)… you at least owe me this much Angel!
She was on the verge of crying again… I may have pushed too far…
Me: Alright alright… it’s just my suggestions… unless you have another place in mind…
There was silence for the next 5 mins before Angel said…
“OK… let’s do it your way then”
*End of chap*
Chapter 61
Previously in chap 60… I needed to talk it out with Angel… in a hotel…
We left the BBQ close to 8pm and we took a cab to Fragrance Hotel in Harbourfront. Fragrance hotel was all I could think of because of the incident with Jamie but I chose Harbourfront because it seems like the least sleazy hotel at least location wise.
Before we checked in we went over to a nearby 7-11 to get some snacks and water.
Me: do you want to drink alcohol?
Angel: Might as well…
I remember taking a bottle of Bacardi telling her we just share one because she can’t take too much of it. At the counter while I was paying I saw condoms… my 2IC did stir in me for a moment… I mean I haven had any action for the past 3 months. But I didn’t buy it… mainly because Angel was right beside me and also the purpose of the hotel wasn’t for that.
Once we check-in just right before we entered our room Angel spoke at the door step…
Angel: Jay…
Me: Yes?
Angel: Please let me know I can trust you when we go in okay?
Me: Hmm
That was all I said and I opened the door. We just chill and watch TV sitting on the bed for a while all the way close to 10pm when Angel’s phone started ringing and she went to the main door to pick it up. It was Lawrence obviously… Because the room was small I could hear her conversation even without moving an inch from my bed.
Apparently she cooked up some reason of her not feeling well… cramp or something and decided to go home earlier and rest. I think Lawrence offer to visit her at her house but she said…
Angel: No you can’t come… my parents are not ready for you… please babe I hope you understand… don’t make things difficult for me already…
… Alright I will take care of myself…
… If I feel better we have breakfast tomorrow morning okay? …
… okay I’m gonna sleep soon too… love you… bye…
She hung up and walk back to the bed…
Me: What went wrong?
Angel: What?
Me: What went wrong between us? How did this happen?
Angel wasn’t looking at me… and she only replied a minute later…
Angel: Nothing… not really…
Me: What!? Explain yourself…
She started crying… I’ll just summarize our conversation here because if I made it into a dialogue it would become a very long transcript.
Basically why we broke up and she did what she did was over two reasons… the smaller reason was because of Jamie. She said she was still in shocked and often the reminder upsets her a lot. It was a lingering and haunting memory she tried to forget about it but couldn’t, she knew she have no rights to be upset because technically we were not together and she was with William but she just cannot help herself.
The main reason was still because of me… I was too good to her. She said meeting Lawrence let her knew the relationship we had could not sustain eventually. I was too nice to her I give in to her every request but I guess Lawrence showed much more maturity and could even offer advice and prepare her for the society. Lawrence tells her what is good for her and what is not and simply does not allow her to just indulge in her wishes.
Oh yes she did mention how she enjoyed the love I showered her with and all the pampering but ultimately she knew she was too spoiled and she knew she needed to change… It was the result of the typical saying… “Too much good is also bad”.
It also reminded me of a Chinese saying… 男人不坏，女人不爱 (girls love bad boys). Being a Mr Nice Bf doesn’t pay off necessary. This change the course of my reaction and the way I handled relationship in the future.
*End of chap*
Chapter 62
Previously in chap 61… the truth is finally revealed…
I’m not sure how fellow readers feel after reading thus far… I know most have shown sympathy for me but do remember this is my side of the story so I may have been unknowingly biased to myself as much as I try to be neutral.
In hind sight, today I can understand what she meant by me being too good to her and we eventually cannot sustain. Being married I can see the importance of helping your spouse grow, challenging each other if need be so that you add value in each other’s life. But 8 years ago for a 20 year old girl to understand and see that… is it possible?
Is this why they say girls tend to mature faster than boys? To be honest I’m not too sure if those reasons Angel told me was the truth or was she hiding something else. I don’t know and I guess this will always remain a mystery to me.
Back to the story…
Me: So there is nothing left for me any more in there right… in your heart (I find myself saying very cheesy things when I was younger… now I don’t think I can save it out like that… lol)
Angel: sob… there is…. Sob…. Just that… sob sob…
Me: Just that what?
Angel: sob… just that I’m being selfish… I want the best of both worlds… I want to continue my current relationship but also still want your attention… sob… it’s very selfish of me I know…. I’m so sorry…
I just sat by the bed speechless… there were things I wanted to argue… I wanted to shout… but what’s the point of it. I just sat on the bed wiping my tears whenever it came out uncontrollably.
Angel: Jay… sob… I’m sorry… but you don’t deserve this… I don’t deserve you…
When Angel said that I kept having flashbacks of TV shows… this is how girls always try to reject guys with minimal damage done… Is that what she is pulling off right now? Still I remain silence… wiping away my tears…
The both of us were literally sitting beside each other… crying on our own, sorting out our own emotions until we both calm down…
Me: You know what… forget it… forget about everything… let’s just move on Angel… but can you stay here can company me just for the night?
Angel did not reply but just gave me a really tight hug… being a drama king last time… I still remember telling myself this may be the last time I’m hugging her. I was holding onto her for as long as I could.
Angel: Jay… can I go wash up… I’m in a mess right now…
Me: ok… sure…
She was gone in the washroom… meanwhile I was trying to create an ambience to distract ourselves so I open the snacks we bought and the Barcadi and turn on the TV volume louder trying to find interesting channels to watch.
When she came out of the bathroom she took over the Barcadi and snacks while it was my turn to wash up and cool down myself. In case you were wondering we both wore back the same attire after we showered (a bit defeat purpose especially for the clean freaks out there… haha)
*End of chap*
Chapter 63
When I came out of the bathroom Angel was watching the news, I took over Barcadi and we just chat randomly for a while and I remember vividly the news was talking about the news of Gary Ng (aka Singapore’s Edison Chen) sex scandals. Just to break the ice I asked…
Me: You know about him?
Angel: Yea… so famous how not to know…
Me: Got see any of his videos?
Angel: No la… siao… nice meh? I mean the girls so poor thing… was their face captured?
Me: I don’t know… I never watch also…
But for the fun of it I actually used my smartphone to surf for his videos immediately and found a few samples… I showed Angel.
We only saw 2 or 3 of them and we fast forward it most of the time… but one particular video scene change the whole ambience in the room again…
Angel: Oh wow… that’s a good position…
Me: What do you mean?
Angel: Feels damn shiok!
Me: How do you know?
Angel: erm…. Erm…
Me: Forget it I don’t want to know… (my heart was aching to the bloody max) I want to sleep already…
I just laid down on one side of the bed back facing Angel… there was no way I could fall asleep… My mind was just messing with itself… my thoughts went from bad to worse… from thinking about how they were fucking each other in that position…. To imagining Angel being fuck while Lawrence laughing at me right in front of her phone when it showed incoming calls from me… I was losing my rationale…
I turned around and raised my voice towards Angel again… “Did you guys did that!?”
Angel: Did what?
Me: That position by Gary Ng just now!!
Angel: What? Jay what’s wrong… can you don’t ask such things please… you are being scary…
Me: TELL ME!!!
Angel: sob… yes…
Me: WHAT ELSE DID YOU ALL DO!!
Angel: Jay… please stop… don’t ask such things… I’m not answering anymore… I’m scared of you right now…
I force myself on Angel by putting my body weight on her… I was forcefully kissing her but she was avoiding my lips. But it didn’t matter… I started attacking her neck by licking it. My hands reached into her shirt and was groping her breast through her bra.
Angel: Jay! STOP!!! PLEASE!!! PLEASE STOP!!!
Angel did not had the strength to fight back… my left hand was strong enough to lock both her hands and the movement of her lower half were limit by my body weight. Angel was crying profusely… you know how rapists gain strength when they see their victims cry? I cannot understand it… I just couldn’t do it… There was no way I could continue… I stopped shortly… and I was hugging Angel with my body on top of her… crying… there was so much frustration boiling up in me I finally let out…
I cried out: HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO ME!? HOW CAN YOU CHEAT ON ME!? WHY CAN’T YOU CHEAT ON HIM BACK INSTEAD!! …. FUCKKK!!!!
*End of Chap…*
Chapter 64…
Previously in chap 63… I lost my composure and almost rape Angel…
Once Angel regain her composure she was comforting me instead…
Angel: I’m sorry Jay… I’m sorry…
Me: I’m sorry too…
Angel: Is okay… I know that’s not you…
Me: I’m sorry (I did not know what else to say)
What she said next surprize me… I’ll never forget…
Angel: I know how much you want me Jay… be it because you love me or it is just a physical response… I can just be a slut and sleep with you… but… but I decided I need to change too… I don’t want to cheat anymore… first was Mark… then now you… I don’t want to hurt anyone anymore… If I go down the wrong path one more time… I’m really going to lose myself.
What can I respond when she said that?
Also… when she mention the word Mark… one of the thing that strike my mind was… could this be retribution? Because I forcefully separate Mark and Angel thinking I did the right thing so this is how god is punishing me?
Angel gave me a peck on my forehead and she turn her around still holding onto my hand getting ready to sleep… It was an emotional rollercoaster ride for the both of us that night. I’ve never cried so much in my life even till now. The mental exhaustion soon put me to sleep too…
“Jay Darling…”
“Jay Darling…”
I open my eyes… am I dreaming or was Angel calling me? Because her back was facing me I had to raise my body to look over to her side… her eyes were close, it looked like she is sleeping. I must have been hallucinating… I tried to get myself to sleep again.
“Darling…”
I’m sure what I just heard came from Angel… as she was still holding onto my arms with a gentle nudge I manage to flip her 90 degrees so now she was facing the ceiling. I observed a bit longer… from her mouth she murmured again… “Darling…” She was sleep talking… it was the first time I seen her sleep talking having so many opportunities spending the night with her over the last 2 years. It must have been a pretty tiring day for her too.
For the longest time I just admired her beauty… flashing back to the beautiful memories we had this time. And of course flashing back to my 19th birthday which caused my 2IC to stir trouble in my pants. I told myself not to take advantage of Angel… but her beauty was too bewitching for me. I took a risk and took a quick peck on her lips… she did not wake up.
I tried again and gave her another peck… she was still in deep sleep occasionally muttering “Darling”. I was sure she was referring to me because so far based on what I observed she calls Lawrence “Babe or Baby”. I was feeling bold and I really really wanted to make love with Angel again… I put my hands over her waist and flip her gently another 90 degrees so she was facing me now.
I went for it and started kissing her slowly and gently… my hands were in her shirt but just around the waist feeling her smooth skin again. It was soft kisses for at least 5mins before I felt bolder and tried to pry open her mouth a bit with my tongue.
Angel’s mouth opened up a little for me while I placed my tongue into her mouth. Of course she did not reciprocate back. Just when I wanted to try my luck to move my hands northwards Angel suddenly moved causing me to “jump” and she turned 180 degrees back facing me again.
*end of chap*
Chapter 65…
Previously in chap 64… Angel’s deep sleep tempts me to take advantage of her…
I observed for a few seconds… she was still sleeping. The longer she remain sleeping the bolder I became… or should I say my 2IC was sending the wrong signal. It seem like he was taking charge now… I removed the blanket covering both of us and my fingers went to Angel’s shorts. I did not remove them but I stuck my finger from the bottom up through the gaps between her shorts and her thigh.
God I miss the feeling of the warmth between her thighs… and no doubt Angel was wearing a thong beneath her shorts as I felt her buttock. I slide my fingers across the thin fabric barely covering her pussy and the results came out positive. I look and saw my finger coated with a thin film of her juices. Feeling god damn horny I licked it up.
Things got worse as I started heading south and I was smelling Angel’s butt even giving it a kiss through her shorts. I became a pervert on the spot… I went on standing by the bedside admiring her beauty while jerking off placing my 2IC very close to Angel’s face.
I wonder how far I can go with this… for the sheer excitement I actually gently dipped my dickhead on Angel’s lips for less than a second. The excitement of it and the fear of her waking up left a unbroken strand of pre-cum connecting my dickhead and lips. There was no way I could let my 2IC just subside without relieving it now.
I kneel down beside Angel and I whispered… “I love you angel… I love you a lot” and started kissing her again while jerking off to myself. Still she did not wake up… for one instant I really wanted to make love with her I pulled off a wrong move.
For some crazy reasons I felt I could just pull up her top and removed it completely… did I succeed? Yes… but the moment I removed her top Angel opened her eyes and woke up… but still in a state of daze… her eyes widen when she saw my dick so close to her face…
Angel: Jay! What! What are you doing!?
Me: I’m sorry Angel… I just missed you too much. I… I needed to relieve myself…
Angel: But I told you right? I can’t sleep with you… please don’t do this to me…
Feeling disappointed upon hearing that… I tried my luck by compromising…
Me: sigh… I know… but can you help me to relieve “didi” (referring to my 2IC)
Angel: I… don’t think that’s a good idea…
Me: Darling… please…
Without waiting for her response I grab her hand to hold onto my dick… Angel wanted to let go but my hands was holding onto hers firmly having no intention to release it… I only let go when she was finally holding onto my dick voluntary.
She felt my 2IC pulsating hard… you could see her stares and perhaps even her lust for my 2IC for a moment… Angel was definitely thinking about it…
*end chap*
