- It should be obvious that you never sign anything or even promise your financial commitment to any other third party (don’t want O$P$ and pigs money at your doorstep!)
-
I would also ask her to be exceeding candid about her financial dilema so that I can plan how to help her free her debt as quickly as possible. I will tell her that once I take charge of alleviating her debt, I will see through my commitment (as long as she sees through hers).
-
Be mindful that she does not try this trick on multiple other would be “patrons” (or should I say “boyfriends”/Uninformed Roberts). They tend to do that. Getting sevaral small trenches of money from different men adds up. Be very upfront and specific about that if she wants your help, this cannot happen.
-
There is truism in that for hospitalisation in China, many a time a local must pay upfront in order to receive treatment. People there do suffer due to poor medical coverage.
- Some Interesting factoids about pretext for soliciting money:
- Now this part is really, really contentious and controversial, so please bear with me and reserve judgment.
-
House damaged due to flood, typhoon, vandals etc.
-
Need to move house, because provincial governor was going to reprosess the property as the land was given by don’t know who grandfather’s uncle who had whatsoever royal links. Or, a certain road or rail will be built across the farm her parents owned etc… new farm costs lots more money.
-
Brother getting married, house too small. She will need to buy a new house for brother or renovate and enlarge current residence.
-
Brother(s) or Sister(s) having to pursue further education and need the money assistance.
- “Bo Chap” does
-
“Bo Chap” used in the context of empowering yourself in a relationship means having a detached attitude in the outcome of your pursuits. It is confident nonchalance about how the object of your pursuit reacts. You do not leap for joy when she responds favourably. Neither do you despair should she spurn or ignores your efforts to woo her.
-
“Bo Chap” in the context of empowerment can be also construed as not needing her. You don’t need her to feel good or desired. You ‘bo chap’ whether she gives you positive response or not. You alone are responsible for your self esteem and how confident you are going to feel.
-
Don’t offer everything upfront. If she actually fails to deliver on the service as per your expectation, you can cut loss quickly – thereby minimizing the damage to your wallet.
-
Make sure that it is not a girl friend based relationship but a patron-mistress. If it is the former, this is simply a very expensive “chu jie” session!
-
Phone no money
-
Need money for school
- It is not WHAT they say but
- In spite of the obvious lie, never lose control of your temper and emotions. (Unless you want to break off this relationship).
-
Understand the real reason and motivation why the PRC WL needs the money(afterall your patronage fees should be more than adequate to cover her lifestyle)? Is it only greed per se? Or taught by a Mother Hen to extract more money from you?
-
Why the need for the lie?
-
Present generally a serious take charge mode of communication. Use man-speak (the use of cold, rational, problem solving tone) with a hint of threat of breaking off the relationship if she insist on getting the money.
- After the hard talk, which use woman-speak (emotional caring tone) to drive home your point and the solutions. So that she will be ready to accept it!
- Hi Gentle Beast, now this is what filial piety is about
-
honouring your late parents’ wishes despite the feeling of discomfiture in the execution. You have my utmost respect for that GB!
-
If gifts are for many, it can be as ‘cheap’ as branded sports apparel (or even cigars) for the male and some trinkets for the ladies.
-
If for the family and not individuals, my last gift that went very well without breaking the bank – i.e. cost less than a bottle at Club Infinitude - is a Swarovski crystal of a dragon that I gave to the head of the household. (I got it cheap when I travel to Austria, Tyrol).
Quote:
Originally Posted by
golfnut
I think having an healthy and fit body helps when you are negotiating, based on some of experience in China.
….
The other way is martial arts but I am too old for it. I heard qigong helps too and it can help to make your rod as hard as steel. A jewellery trader in his 60s I know was practising it and soon after, was caught by the wife for having Spanish mistress.
In any case, I like short powerful training since I do not have time.
Interesting point golfnut, care to share? I have met decrepit invalids who were so tough to crack business-wise that I literally gave up despite me holding financial and morphological advantage over them. Don’t know how much mental toughness correlates with physical toughness. Care to enlighten?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ward1967
Sharing of a Mistress.
Well if with friends no If only friends via online then sure. Just going by the golden rule from where i grew up, I would never be allowed to date any of my friends ex GF’s unless the friend was dead or he had moved away. Guessing I would put mistress in same catagory. But also depends on time spent with them. Our rule was 4 months. If with them less than 4 months was fair game, longer than 4 months then hands off.
Just my humble thought.
Guess it is one of them unwritten/unspoken rules which are assumed to be understood and accepted by all parties. My contention is: what if you actually articulate this rule, find the assumption fallacious and that all the involved parties give their blessing to proceed (like in my case with Xin2)? Could there then be still an underlying moral imperative that still prevents this?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
warbird
Thx to bro justime n other bros for the most useful info posted here.
I just sent a sms to JJ stating that I’ll not be able to continue my patronage bcos my inguinal hernia has flared up. I hope to remain a good fren n offer to take her to dinner n KTVs. Of course I’ll compensate her for her time.
Good day!!
Guess you jumped the gun warbird (and its all good), I have not yet talked in length about being a “bastard” (as in “confident bastard” of Masterstroke 3) and yet you applied this concept beautifully.
You know that you will not be getting your money’s worth with JJ (since you are temporarily sexually incapacitated) so you decide to terminate the relationship. You did not let vague notions of the agreement compel you to follow through on it (despite knowing that this uneven exchange). Many men would actually simply settle and pay the retainer till they recover. They are afraid of being seen as a ‘bastard” and hence acquiesced to the unfair and uneven exchange.*
(Yes, it is an exchange. You give your mistress money, she in turn provides you the service of satisfying your carnal desires as well provide gfe (via Love wayangs)).
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Soul_Reaper
I think you are referring to ‘Sanchin" training …… very effective
Other forms of qigong dun seem to have the same effect.
Didn’t realize that so many brothers here so well verse in fitness and wellness! Must call on you guys soon as I do want to improve my fitness level!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
warbird
Hi bro justime,
Yes, it wont be a fair exchange. Our parting is amicable…
I should be OK in 7 to 10 days, hopefully.
BTW, I’m negotiating w/ a couple of gers (one KTV ger n one hairstylist) to be my mistress, beginning next month. They both want a long-term RS (at least a yr) n both ask me to pay off their family debts upfront (both from Fujian but dun know each other!). How do u handle such a request? How does this fit into the payment calculus?
Thx n hv a great day!!
Warbird, never, never pay upfront.
Once their burden (or crutch on you) is alleviated, they have a taken for granted attitude. They don’t “need” you now - and ironically despite your help, you are now seen as an inconvenience.
I yet to see a PRC display an attitude to gratitude to her benefactor that last for one year
!
Know the feeling you sometimes get when you solve an apparantly insurmountable problem and the subsequent arrogance that comes in tandem. They think that just getting you to settle their debt (by their promise) is all to it - and to their personal credit. They think that they once have “sold” you their mistressing service, they often forget their obligation to deliver it on their sales promise.
Many in fact packed up and go, without even a second look at the promised commitment.
I would handle such request by saying that I am cash flow tight presently. You say (something alone this lines):
“I have regular money coming in throuhout the months - some months quite a lot while others less. Once I promise to help you re-structure your family debt, I will plan to see it through by setting aside money for regularly for you. At at times when I got more income coming, I will give you very big bonus so that you can be free of your debt quicker. And I expect to have a windfall soon!”
Note:
.
Make it clear that the deal is with her and her only! Give a token two or three months advance max for her to show good faith - if her financial dilema is really pressing. Know however that a lot of exageration is in order on her part, the PRC mei want to collect as much upfront as possible.
(Your “winning position” is diametrically opposite hers: The less the advance payment the better for you.)
The PRC mei think that this situation is applicabe to all nations and countries too (remember that PRC mei in general is very parochial in their outlook). Hence “hospitalisation” is their number one favourite reasons they use when getting money. Hospitalisation has the emotional blackmail element - made more realistic in their mind due to their personal context from living in China. And its also more disarming so that people is more receptive toward lending - the PRC is seen as “filial” and dutiful (and not greedy and self serving in seeking for the loan). Hospitalisation is the PRC mei’s number one tactic in getting a prospect to agree to part with his money.
So make sure that the hospitalisation reason is not a ruse or pretext.
I generally see alarm bells when Hospitalisation is proffered as a reason!
Hope this helps warbird!
… and by the way, in case you miss anyone misses my earlier posting, Paeng (my current Thai mistress) too was a hair dresser - now present business owner of hair salon! Me and warbird got some kind of yuan fen!
Have three interesting points to share (including a Masterstroke Tit-bit used by Hua and Terrence) when discussing about hospitalization/medical cost:
I remember a discussion that a Mistress Brotherhood had concerning the ways a PC WL solicits for money. The following are the top three most common pretexts in my experience:
a) Hospitalization and medical fee.
b) Finance company re-possessing property cause of failure to pay mortgage (by implication, the family has to sleep in the streets).
c) Gambling debts (invariably a member of the family). (Seldom a friend or even themselves – which is ironically the most plausible pretext.)
Of all the above reasons, everyone in the brotherhood agrees that hospitalization / medical fees is the number one most common pretext we heard in our own respective experience. How about other cheongsters? Is this also the most common pretext in your case as well?
We are at a stage whereby we prefer the girls to tell us the upfront and unvarnished truth - that they over spent way beyond their means, they covet a particular merchandise, they are intrinsically shopoholics, they themselves incur the gambling debts rather than having to resort to lies in order to solicit money.
We sometimes find the situation logically incongruous: A WL likes to portray herself as noble and filial when it comes to family matters. A WL who is independently staying alone and away from the family due to the fact that they can’t stand the stifling oppression familial oppression, suddenly gets all mushy and filial during crisis moments such as when a hospitalization situation occur.
At first we thought that the Chinese virtue of filial piety runs deeper than we thought, and that not being native Chinese we cannot really apprehend how deeply this virtue is internalized within the Chinese psyche. (PRC WL also likes to fuel this line of thinking, saying that despite how nasty their family treats them, they still have an obligation to them due to inextricable blood ties). We often praised this Cultural imperative and say that despite the meis meis deceitful attitude, being filial is the one redeeming virtue.
However over time when we encountered more and more of such cases, we began to probe and thoroughly investigate the perception. We delved deeper into the the purported hospitalization situation.
We find that we only get a partial picture. There is often many other ulterior motives involved even if it is a genuine case.
True story: one purportedly filial WL takes on medical expenses for their parents on condition that the family house is “mortgaged” under her name. Her justification is that if something happens to her parents, her sibling(s) will just avoid paying the bills and she does not want to be left carrying the burden all alone.
In business analogy: its like I pay first, but you secure repayment by collateralizing the family asset (which may be worth more than the money I pay).
All in all, we find that PRC are no more dutiful and filial piety than any of us here in Singapore and elsewhere. The WL knows however, to use this “cultural stereotype” to their advantage in order to make themselves a saint. This is so that the poor uninformed Robert will be more predisposed toward giving them the money!
/////////////////Masterstroke Tit Bit 4 /////////////////////
“Call their bluff!”
(That is why I hate playing poker with Hua and Mike!)
When the ladies come soliciting them for money using the pretext of money, Hua and Mike like to proposition them thus (by calling their bluff):
Mike and Hua usually will give a show of being empathetic and then say that they will send a staff from their China office to the WL ladies’ home (or where ever their sick relative is). The made it clear tha their China staff will send the WL relatives to the hospital and then make arrangements for Mike and Hua to pick up the bill later. And he can only do so via this modus operandi as this is “company policy”.
(By the way, both of them really have the capability to do this should the hospitalization solicitation be proved true. I myself have tried this “call you bluff” Masterstroke Tit Bit only twice. And in both instances, I am really really convinced that the lady is bluffing).
Incredible thing is, after this proposition is offered (with no upfront money and no money given through the care of the WL), the WL’s parents and relatives illness suddenly becomes not life threatening, operations can wait a little while longer etc……
And to put it into perspective on how widespread this fake pretext is, out of dozens of such “call your bluffs” scenario we administer collectively regarding hospitalization, we only encountered only one genuine case – Mike’s case.
And he did indeed take care of the bill (about only SGD 6, 000 as promised.)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
warbird
……
Even if I’m smitten by a chio ger, I now pretend not to be interested.
After no ctc from me for 2 days, the hairstylist apprentice sent a SMS asking me what I’m doing…she is going to get the medical exam n blood tests. Not a word for any upfront money! She originally demanded SGD 16K!
Brilliant! Clap! Clap! (The number of times I shaved a women’s bottom should qualify me to be a hairstylist as well – a pubic hairstylist!)
You did well, you created options for yourself (and hence not needy in your interaction and transaction with her). You have that ‘take it or leave it’ nonchalance which is very attractive for women.
(Another tip:
Once a lady learns that you have multiple options besides her – and that you are likely to offer her ‘rival’ your patronage instead of her, the competitive beast in her kicks in!
It is really fun to see her ‘manipulations and machinations’ when she tries to win you over her purported competitor! … I will elaborate on the use of “Jealousy” in one of my Masterstrokes!)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ol’coyote
ahh…me ever applied this masterstroke…
but it was to a lean; bony guy at a coffeeshop…
……………………
the drinks fella tell me the guy walked off after me left…
he did not finish the 3rd prata…
guess he only wanted cash to get himself drunk…or some cigs…
will try tis masterstroke on gals…hopefully soon…
Hi coyote, nice twist to the masterstroke. Absolutely loved your little anecdote!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Loving_Dickhead
……
plus the followings:
Your call bluff strategy is certainly useful for such situations. I would say, hands on heart, 95% of such “loans” and/or “advances” are fictitious at best.
Cheers,
Thanks Loving Dickhead for enumerating the excuses and pretexts that WL uses to get us part with our money. 95% of the stories/pretexts are fiction? I think more likely to be 99%!
What I find it strange is the paucity of hearing direct truths being touted as a pretext to solicit for your money.
“I am spend thrift and hence have to use my pussy to fuel my spending habits” or my favourite, “I gambled uncontrollably until I get myself heavily into debt”.
All the so call oft reasons usually offered come from sympathy mode – in essence appealing to your hero complex to her damsel in distress. It is quite bland and boring really. “Boo hoo hoo, I am essentially a demure girl who is compelled by circumstances to sacrifice my ‘morals’ / I hate to solicit money from you but circumstances forced my hand”.
It is as if she is trying to obscure the perception that you might see her as a manipulative, scheming, materialistic and greedy bitch. What she does not realize is that such a perception will manifest when she is found out – as it will invariably be the case for season players.
Okay maybe I am so jaded with hearing the self same reason, but I personally I like the pretext to come from a woman with fatal flaws such as a gambling addiction or shopaholic (instead of victims of circumstance).
Coming from such a situation makes her character seem more feisty and colorful. And women with poor impulse control in general can be ‘manipulated’ to go far in experimenting and tend to be more adventurous in bed!
As an aside, I had ever BY a lady (for three months) who told me in my face that she is a sucker for branded goods and is willing to go far if I give her “expensive presents.” In her case, No cash is exchanged – only presents.
(Beware: this arrangement is often more expensive that standard retainer fee!).
I accepted her proposition because of her sheer audacity and chutzpah!
Just a little anecdote about this particular girl:
Seeing the numerous of facial products she owns somehow brought out the little devil in me. I admit that I was ‘irritated’ seeing that she wants me to buy her more facial products despite her dresser being stacked high in them -most of them unused
(I was not quite fully on the empowered stage then - still only in transition!)
What I did was to then intentionally asked to come on her face and then for her to use this come and apply it like a face cream. I made it difficult for her to say no. I can still vividly remember her attempts to please me. Her first hesitant attempts to apply my come on her face; then her slightly imploring looks for me to tell her to stop, and finally realizing the futility in getting me to change my mind, she took in a deep breath and then just applied my “cream” with such gusto (with lip licking relish, exaggerate moaning and all). Her subsequent slutty actions were in marked contrast with her earlier hesitance. Gotta say that it is hell of a turn on that I fucked her hard there and then. (Nope I didn’t kiss her and congealed spunk is indeed a little like facial mask - texture wise!).
And I didn’t buy her the face cream. Instead I bought her a ladies Tag Heuer watch that set me back $1800. Guess what? Two weeks later, she even had the audacity to ask me for my “scrotal facial cream treatment” again so that I could buy her another watch!
Talk about feisty!
(By the way, there should be no feeling of obligation of the necessity to ‘reward’ your mistress in participating such ‘kinky activities’. You give when you feel that she is deserving - on your terms!
I gave her the watch then because I have not fully imbibed the prinicples of empowerment then. Admitedly I did feel a little sense of obligation in this instance!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
warbird
Now I let the gers compete for me, hehehe. I do hv a question though. Let’s suppose u r in the process of discussing a possible RS w/ a KTV ger named A. When u visit that KTV one nite, u call a couple of other gers to sit w/ u instead of A, would she be so upset that she severs her ongoing discussion w/ u? Or should u also get A to sit w/ u but show interest in others as well?
…..
IMHO, if a man can come on a ger’s face, it’s the ultimate demonstration of her total submission n acceptance of him as her master…
I would choose the latter option. Preferably with a girl whom you know covets you. This is to emphasize your status (girls often do not have an independent opinion, they like to get their cue from the choices made by other women - hence the desirability of the ‘married man").
By sitting with a lady who likes you, your perceived value in A’s eyes will go go up. Never mind if the other girl(s) is sitting with you pretty or not when compared to A. Women don’t see that way – they just see another “rival".
Also when you finally decide to go for “A”, she will feels a little triumph and have a nice shot of ego boost!
COF is really quite fun and enjoyable, but in the context of my experience it takes a lot more “work” to get a PRC accept this vis-à-vis other nationalities.
And believe it or not, for me Singaporean girls are the most receptive to the idea of COF! What about other brothers?
Quote:
Originally Posted by
yinyang
Common place fibs (or “strawberries”) with thai crowd, not restricted to:
> sick buffalo (or died!)
LOL.
Never heard that one before!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ansonsohna
……
i try so many times with tis gal in my same office building but no respond. so i use some masterstroke u recommend by being bo chap when i see her nxt time. After ignore me so long, she finally call me back without me make any prompting. Tis is first time happen in my life n i so happy.
kum sia sifu. Maybe no need go Health Centre so much for release myself.
Hi ansonsohna, just thought that I would clarify the concept of “Bo Chap” a little:
NOT
mean Non Action. You cannot passively sit and wait for things to happen. You need to be proactive and take action. The fact that the lady who worked at the same building called you is not because you bo chap her per se.
It is actually you suddenly bo chap her - a change in your usual sycophantic behavior towards her
.
It is your change in attitude that intrigues her. That is actually what made you “suddenly” appealing to her. But do remember this: you did invest time and energy to woo her prior to this moment. The positive response is actually a culmination of the many days you took action in trying to get to know her and then suddenly displaying a confident attitude. It is NOT as if you bo chap and then she starts to notice you.
So Anson, when you see an object that is worthy of your pursuit. You need to take proactive action. Go for it! You need to take action to get to know her. And not simply adopt a “bo chap” attitude and hope that she will gravitate toward you because of the cool nonchalance you display.
(By the way only a few persons can successfully pull off the cool detached demeanor and get the girl excited by it. We shall not even try!)
And bro ansonsohna, …. Congratulations, you had inadvertently locked in on the attitude to project with the object of your pursuit. And please do not purposely ignore or bo chap her now. The sudden display of confidence got you noticed. Don’t waste the opportunity to build on from here.
I have NOT elaborated on how to build from your present gain. So I would just need you to use your gut feeling and ‘muddle’ your way through. For now, just be confident in your dealings with her subsequently – without worrying or fretting whether you made a good impression on her or not! Project confidence by knowing what you want from her and from your life direction in general. Good luck.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Koreanlover
I am back and seeking advice. This new KTV girl I have been seeing does not chu jie. She does not have a BF yet as she is new. I am interested to BY her but since she does not chu jie, I am wondering if I should offer her to be BY by me. Should I do the acid test by asking if for one-off screw or just go straight to the terms of BY? Need some advice
Hi Koreanlover, its is so much easier to couch your offer in terms of BY rather than chu jie. Ladies seem to be more amendable toward Client’s Patronage vis-à-vis solicitation to chu jie. Some ladies who absolutely say no to chu jie will gladly take on a patron.
Remember by earlier, masterstroke tit-bit? Do use euphemisms when making the offer: Such as “Can I take care of you?”
Also you can learn from Bro Warbird’s situation: Do go through some of the discussions we have here in the thread - it is theory as applied in the context of his real life. You may like to use some of the learning points there to frame your personal situation.
Just two quick reminders (in case you do not have the time to go through the thread again):
All in all, do go through the thread again to remind you of key principles that you must apply. Good luck and have fun!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Gentle Beast
Hi justime
Thanks for all the insightful tips to put the odds back in the guys favour in this game. I enjoyed your occasional musings and anecdotes amid the paragraphs of advice and tips, good stuff!
Pardon me for momentarily taking the tone of this thread on mistresses away. I’ll be making a trip to my ancestral homeland in Fujian, to spend a few days with my parent’s siblings and their offsprings. I;m prepared to meet them with an open mind, but nagging me is if they asked me for my address, contact in Singapore, can you advise how I can deal with this? I’m concerned if anyone of them will use that benefit of ‘dropping by’ or worse use excuses to come over to work etc..
I hope with your experience, you can offer me something I can use, thanks!
Thank you Gentle Beast for the compliment and the rep points. Appreciate it.
In your case, the sense of apprehension and disquiet about your relations imposing upon you (and your lifestyle) is not without basis. They will likely call on this familial connection at some point if they want to venture overseas. This can take the form as simple and transient as a holiday / vacation or to something that has a more permanent ring to it such as asking you to guarantor to find work and/or get a long stay visa. So might as well take it as a given that they will do so.
(Mike & Hua have very deep familial connections in China and I can see from their experience that their relatives are not averse to using the familial connection to impose on them. It is survival after all. The Chinese in general do not feel “pai say” and have any hang-ups to utilize what they got. Also know that a lot of them are quite parochial (they hardly travel outside of the mainland and when they do its mostly on conducted tours). Thus an average mainlander has hardly any connections and network beyond their municipality. This means that understandably they gravitate will to you – a little “guan xi” is better than none at all!)
Again, I do not have any context of your personal life except what is given here above. But the thing to do is that you have to be pragmatic over the whole issue. In the case of Mike & Hua, they have businesses in China and there might be the possibility of them needed their China familial connections at some point. So Mike and Hua do indulge them.
It is difficult to refuse them your address and contact details. (I presume that you still want to maintain cordial ties). This being said, do however draw the line at inviting them to stay at their house at all. Once you allowed them in, it is difficult to chase them out without “shang gan qing”. So prepare an excuse in advance on why they cannot stay with you. If you have many spare rooms at home like Mike and Hua, give the excuse that your house also doubles up as an office – and that you will have partners and employees coming over frequently.
Another common way by which your ‘extended’ family will use the connection with you is to ask you to be a guarantor –for work/ social visit visas etc, and they may even solicit your help to look for a job for them. Generally for the guarantor bit to extend their stay, you cannot do much but to oblige. It should be obvious that if you feel bad vibes, do not even offer this.
So in the event that you provide the guarantor for social visa, do remember to take charge in ensuring that they do not overstay. Mike, Hua and even myself always remind our relatives of the imminent visa due date. To make the situation more diplomatic, we occasionally like to give the excuse that we got a call from immigration as part of their routine check to confirm the exact date our relatives will be leaving Singapore – especially after they have already extended their visa. (You can take advantage of the perception of Singapore’s reputation of being strict and efficient). Your relatives won’t know if that is true for sure and it also subtly communicates to them that they are being monitored (hence not to try anything funny).
Hua even tried this “trick” on his relative’s child because he wants to chase him out. Good kid but Hua simply doesn’t want the hassle to ensure that all is well with him. His nephew is a recent graduate who is trying to seek employment in Singapore and whose dad is a senior government official in China. And if people so high up can be sold this line (Hua and this relative is still ‘close’ till this day), the average Chinese should be similarly vulnerable to this simple machination.
Hope this helps a little.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
theUnforgotten
Never add in
555 - heard most of them before
Quote:
Originally Posted by
LeSaux
How about need money for new ride? Brand new subaru wrx sti…
I will talk more about this later but for now remember:
HOW they say it (and under what context) that is important
.
Sometimes despite the fact that we know it is an obvious lie, we still fall into their machinations. It is because of the PRC WL employment of the “how” (such as sheding copious tears, flatter your ego, threats of ‘breaking up’ with you because you can’t even support her in such easy request, the use of love wanyangs and seduction …).
The more empowering approach (assuming that you still want to continue the relationship) is to use a negotiatory approach. In business dealings, you never lose your temper (unless it is a deliberate strategy). The same applies here to when dealing with the mistress.
The short version of the strategy when confronted with situation of a WL asking for money is:
* Know however that when a woman (whom you still want to keep) asks for additional money it is generally bad news. You want to minimise damage to your wallet and extract the most out of the situation!
I will elaborate more about this on Masterstroke 3: Be a Confident Bastard.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Gentle Beast
……… I’m making this courtesy visit to my ancestral homeland as an extension of my holiday and partly as a respect for my late parents’ wish that I will at least meet up with my relatives there in my lifetime.
Justime, one more question - I don’t want to be there bearing ‘2 bunches of bananas’ (without any gifts) so would appreciate if you can share some tips on what I can bring along (something that is thoughtful and yet not expensive). Thank you!
It is difficult to suggest the type of gifts in the absence of key information. Like for how may persons you are buying for, male/female, age group, budget. Once I have this information, I will be in a better position to recommend.
For gifts buying I usually rely on my PA (even for those of my gf and mistress). Unless it’s a deliberate gift buying strategy to win over a ladies heart or capture that elusive biz deal – I hardly do my own “shopping”.
Now I learnt this important thing in my numerous shopping jaunt with a PRC mei mei: Despite China being the “world’s factory” and the proliferation of imitation goods there, it is important to communicate that the gifts come from overseas and not bought in China.
For example, my PRC mistress (ex waitress) for example bought her dad an Adidas shirt when she returned home. This is something “cheap” but not so readily available in China. This is Ironic, considering the prominence of China at garment manufacturing.
China may be the Contract Manufacturer for a brand but ironically the prices for the goods for the mainland Chinese cost more vis-à-vis overseas – especially for the non imitation originals). Trust me – I know this very well as I do own a China based factory which is a CM of a major brand!
Okay just off the cuff suggestions (in the absence of info):