HI guys
i am earning much higher income than my wife.
we are financial stable… to such an extend both of us can stayed unemployed for the next 10yrs with mthly exp of S$10kmax. all loans were paid and no financial liabilities.
why i suggest parenthood is i felt everything material is all 110% ready.
i meet my wife since uni days and even then she has no much friends due to her strict up bringing. in fact , i was the partyboy who scarifice all my social life for her. 10yrs on ( 2 yrs courtship ) , both were so attached to each other though.
this is all real , but defence .
that’s why i dun not know this outbrust.
Bro Leungccsg, maybe everyone needs a little space to breath from time to time. It could be due her work preassure & stress at her work place. Nevetheless, once she steps home she is encountered with a different level of mental stress from you.
Honestly, I don’t recommend you to engaging a PI for this instance. You might be killing your relationship with her by telling her that you no longer trust her.
Sometimes, I feel its best that you just leave her for a while but in the mean time, observe her closely. Should she needs you to be there at certain situation, you just lend out your loving arms to her.
If she is not prepared to have kids, she sure have her reasons for it. Maybe somethings she just do not wants you to be always that worried over her health or self being.
In short, give a a breather space for a while. Maybe it might help her to sort out her own things up in her mind. Cheers up Bro!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
leungccsg
marriage counselling ? i want but i guess she will not go. she those kind want to save " face “. she does not want people to know abt this incidents
Quote:
Originally Posted by
leungccsg
i noticed that my wife is kind of bored .
she is trying to search for lost contact via those facebook , freindster , names database etc.
if she has 3rd party , she would not do that right ?
Bros, check this Marriage Convention out. Can take it as an outing so she’ll not feel as awkard going for private counselling.
Marriage Convention 2009 English
27 March - 29 March. Only $16 for a couple.
I think such convention will touch the hearts of women more, but that’s maybe what you need if it’s the wife that’s wanting out…
“bring back the wow factor to the vows you have made”
Good luck!
Based on my assessment, your wife prob is prob looking for fun…
No need to feel so emotionally hurt. Still do like fishing….release a lil, pull back a lil. Remind her that you love only her.
and she’ll come round
hi guys
greatly appreciated all your advise and listening ears.
i am having a hard time emotionally and i am grateful to get this support from you.
i have been talking to my wife parents and my friends who knew her.
there might be another prespective of looking at things rather than the 1st wild imagaintion that she had an affairs.
My wife has always been a very competitive person and always wanted to do well in every aspects. be it in schools , sports , personal beauty etc.
even though we do not lack any money to get back life , but when she joined this new company ……. a lot of opportunities was been offered by her boss ( even though her boss is a bastard who scold her continously ). Right from her 1st job until now , none of her ex companies give her the recognition or authority even though she was a manager. but this time the chance is there.
she is someone who does not like to undermine and now when the boss continously undermine her but in the same time gave her opportunities , all the more she wants to prove to her boss that she is capable. She is the youngest snr mgr within the entire organisation and under her there is a lot of older staff who thinks she is not up to the mark.
in desperation , she might want to prove herself by working doubly hard even extra hours in office so that people will have respect for her.
sfor the past mths , she asked for my understanding even though she never tell me anything of the above ( i guess one ).
when she worked so much overtiime , i wonder why ? no need $$$, she does not like OT since 1st job , dun like her boss , why work so hard ?
of coz in the process , i kept pressuring her to spend more time with me. when she is back everyday at 10pm to 11pm, i knows i am very upset even though i did not let out my fustration. could she be facing work stress and could not bear to face with more stress from her husband ? ( esp she think getting home is getting comfortable , mentally and physically ) but she did not get anything ?
no though i felt very neglected and time spent is purely in bed.
most times she is back , i am asleep . before i woke up , she left for work.
do you guys think this might be the logical answer ?
yesterday, she took the initiative to sms me.
Her sms : " Had your lunch ? i am having bad day at
work so not in best of moods today".
my sms : what happen ? R u crying ?
her sms : nope.. just fyi.
my sms : hugs to u. if u need a listening ear, i will be there for u.
is this a good sign ? that when she faced with saddest , she comes back to me ?
well, it is something and shows you are not complete lost.
take your cool, keep your distance and let her have her space but your string still attach.
have a life yourself meanwhile and be interesting. new hobby, sports? something wild? makes her notice you again.
fyi her on your updates to make her wonder….
her lost not yours!
Yes at least she comes to u instead of other guys…
Meaning u should give her a break n let her brain rest…
My opinion Bro after reading your post is that she might take you as a life jacket. I think when your wife married you she must have just started work so emotional not very stable yet.
Being too perfect in a guy does not help too. It is true that bad guys get the most gals. There is a bit of scientific in it. Gals tend to want to contribute to the house or relationship, it helps them to build emotional attachments, by doing everything for her, you deprive your wife of a chance to build emotions or connections with things around her.
If u notice, gals tat always complain that their bf or husband have a lot of bad habits tend not to break off with the guy compare to gals who dun complain too much
I think that sometimes you just have to relax and let her fly a bit, sooner or later she will know that there is no place like home.
Just my 2 cents worth.
this is he 1st weekend after she left.
yesterday, we had a nice chat and i just ask her out for a date .
take it as dating , restart our romance again.
she replied " too quick “.
i thought i was getting some headway but then, it back to square one.